A Pixel-Perfect Paradise
by Fishkiller25
Summary: When someone ends up in their all-time favourite video game series, turned into an anthropomorphic animal, ready to fight off Eggman's robots and the Black Arms invasion, most people would be pretty happy. Until they realise exactly what it means to lose their humanity...
1. Pwned, Noob!

It was just like any other day, until it wasn't.

"Pwned!"

It had started out normally enough. Naomi, aged 17 had been playing several multiplayer games with Jack, her older brother by a few weeks, who being a professional gamer, had won without even trying, though she had put up a rather good fight. They were playing on an old Gamecube, for nostalgia's sake. Jack did have newer, more modern consoles that he usually practiced with every day, but it was Tuesday, their family game night.

Jack was a handsome, tall and thin young man, with messy brown hair and deep brown eyes. Naomi had long black hair cut hime-style, and similar brown eyes. They were dressed rather casually, he had black jogging trousers and no shirt, while she wore tight blue jeans and a burgundy T-shirt that was too big for her, and she knew it, but she kept it because of the very low neckline. Both were quite attractive, and they knew it.

Naomi and Jack had grown up in a very small home, and spent most of their time together. Their mother and father had been forced to work two jobs, so Jack and Naomi often spent nights alone. The parents needed the money to pay off the absurd amount of debt they had incurred in their day-to-day lives, and getting two kids certainly hadn't helped matters much. They were both alcoholics, they both smoked heavily, and they had absurdly expensive tastes when it came to eating out. And they usually ate out, leaving Jack and Naomi alone. Jack and Naomi were actually only half-related, as their parents had what some might call an active social life. Jack and Naomi didn't really care about this fact, because as far as they were concerned, they were the only family they ever really had.

Growing up, Naomi and Jack spent most of their time in the house, playing games together on a NES that their parents got cheaply at a car boot sale. They had Super Mario bros, Double Dragon, and a few other single-player games that they rarely played. As they got older, the siblings started to drift apart; she preferred reading and literature, while he was more into science and physics. Still, every Tuesday night, they always made time to play together. When they were younger, gaming was the only thing they had to pass the long lonely nights.

When Naomi turned 16, she used the money the two of them had secretly been saving up, and they bought a small apartment as far away from their parents as possible. They lived together, and his tournament wins certainly helped out with money whenever her job as a part-time waitress wasn't enough. The apartment collected rent week-by-week rather than month-by-month, but they were okay with it, even if they didn't think much of their neighbours. That was one of the mistakes their parents made, caring so much about what their neighbours thought of them that they only bought the best and most expensive clothes. On Prom night, Naomi wore a light-blue dress that was so frilly she was surprised she could fit it through the door. Jack did okay in his pointlessly expensive tuxedo, even though most of the students attending were far too drunk from the recently-spiked punch bowl to notice, or care, about the difference between a real tuxedo, and a cheap fake one from a store-bought £20 James Bond costume. He got the numbers of several girls that night, and sold the numbers to his less attractive, but almost-equally nerdy friends at a very high price. This money instantly went into their house-fund, as the two had thought about it for years.

"You know, Sis, you are improving." Jack said, moving some of his light brown hair out of his eyes.

"How am I improving?" She asked, taking a drink from a sports bottle filled with water. "I'm still losing to you."

"Yeah, but this time, it took me..." He trailed off as he checked the time on the stopwatch he always kept with him when gaming. "Almost a whole minute! For a non-professional gamer, this is pretty good!"

"'Non-professional gamer'? Don't you mean, 'Casual gamer'?"

"No, you are better than any Casual gamer could ever hope to be. Do you know what a Casual gamer is? It's those people that buy those stupid fitness games and dancing games and pet games and baby games. Cooking mama, that sort of thing."

"You play Dance Dance Revolution every time we go to the arcade."

"That's because there are tournaments for that, with huge prizes. Plus, it helps with agility."

"What do you need agility for? You never go out!"

"That's only because there's nothing for me out there." He said, forlornly looking out of his bedroom window.

"Except winning." She said, grinning evilly at him.

"And money." He said, returning the grin.

"So..." She said, looking at the victory screen on his TV, hooked up to his Gamecube. "Want to play Sonic Adventure 2 Battle?"

"Sure, as long as we don't do the grind race."

"The grind race is the only one I'm good at!"

"The grind race is a contest to see who can hit the B button the fastest." He dismissed, then smiled. "And you know I'm the fastest."

"Fine, we'll do the treasure hunt. But no killing me!"

He grinned evilly. "But ze hunting iz not az revarding az ze killing." He squeaked out in a German accent. He knew it as his impression of The Medic, from Team Fortress 2, but she just thought it was his unbearable awful attempt at a German accent.

"Fine!" she yelled, giving up.

"Fine!" He shouted as he swapped discs, started Sonic Adventure 2 Battle, and selected the Treasure Hunt in 2-player mode. She chose Tikal, he chose Chaos, and the match began...

...And as soon as the match began, Jack's Chaos punched Naomi's Tikal before she could grab any rings. Her death quote played, and Jack's Chaos collected all of the nearby rings before Tikal could respawn, and then he killed her again before she could even dodge.

"Jack!" She yelled in frustration.

"Now now, you chose this level." He said smugly as Chaos jumped and glided off the platform, beginning his emerald search.

Tikal was the better character for a treasure hunt, as she had better emerald-tracking abilities. However, Chaos's punches had a much longer reach, and he didn't need the tracking ability to hit Naomi whenever he could, and randomly run around the match hoping his radar would ping.

It wasn't soon before Jack had found all three. Naomi tried following closely behind him, but whenever she got within range, Chaos punched her and made her lose her rings, and then punched her again when she had gotten up, killing her.

"Pwned!" He yelled out of habit, and then he added "But still, you're pretty good! Want to play Melee?"

"Fine." She muttered.

"Fine!" He said happily as he turned off the Gamecube and switched the discs again.

"Hey, Sis! I bet you I can beat you blindfolded!" He yelled, grabbing an ascot from his ascot drawer and tying it around his eyes.

"You're going to do it anyway, no matter what I say, aren't you?"

"Challenge accepted!" He yelled, ignoring her comment.

It wasn't long before the opening sequence played, which Naomi insisted they watch all the way through, even though he couldn't see a thing. When it was done, they chose to have a regular 2-player battle, with 3 stock and no items. He chose Marth, she chose Zelda/Shiek, and they agreed on Final Destination.

The match soon begun on Final Destination, a large purple platform floating in the middle of space. Naomi's Zelda started off the match by turning into Shiek, and Jack recognised the sound effect. In the time it took for her to transform, Jack's Marth had already crossed to the other side of the platform, and began a vicious combo of sword attacks that didn't give her a chance to recover. She fell of the stage, lost a life, and respawned.

Jack pressed the control pad upwards, making Marth perform his taunt, where he swung his sword around whilst saying "Minna, miteite kure!"

"Bro, what does that mean?" She didn't speak a word of Japanese, and didn't care enough to try and learn.

"It means 'Everyone, look at me'."

"Seriously? Lame."

"Makes sense, if you think about who he is."

She respawned, and tried to hit Marth with her forward-smash, a series of two kicks. He dodge-rolled out of the way, and grabbed her. He threw her forwards, and grabbed her again, chain-grabbing her to the edge of the platform before smacking her down to her death.

She soon respawned, and begun charging up a down-smash. This move could hit anything close to her, in front of her, or behind her, so dodge-rolling was out of the question. Instead, Jack used his B-down move, Counter, which blocked her fully charged attack, and hit her with double of the attack's power.

The attack did quite a bit of damage, but not as much as his combo did. When he was done, they were both on the other side of the field, and his Dolphin Slash, a vicious upward jumping sword slash, was the last move needed to win the game.

"Pwned!" Jack asked smugly, removing his blindfold.

"How did you do that?!" She screeched, putting down her controller. "How?! You were blindfolded, I saw you! You didn't peek!"

"Want to know how I could do that? Well, it's because I am legen... Wait for it..." He begun.

"No!" She yelled, and left, slamming the door on her way out.

She went back to her room, and decided to read some Fanfiction. She always enjoyed the stories of games more than the gameplay of games, and when a game didn't have much story, she'd find a novelisation of the game that somebody would have inevitably made.

She loaded up , and searched for Sonic The Hedgehog Fanfiction. She always liked the Sonic series, she just wished the newer games had more plot to them. She used to use DeviantArt for reading Fanfiction, but she was banned from that site ever since she got into a rather ...heated argument with some SonAmy shippers, Sonic fans who believed Sonic the Hedgehog and Amy Rose the Hedgehog should marry. The argument was about whether stalking, violence and death threats were a legitimate way to begin a relationship, and if a relationship started like this could ever blossom into something beautiful when the object of the stalker's desires gives up, and lets the stalker have her way with him. It totally wasn't, by the way. Naomi had made that point clear, she believed that it was sick and wrong, and Amy Rose should just go home, stop being such a psychotic stalker, and date someone that suited her more, like Big the Cat or Tails the Fox. Then again, Cream the Rabbit also had a crush on Tails. In Naomi's mind, she did, anyway. Never mind that the two had never done or said anything to suggest the slightest hint of a relationship, it was a better love story than Tails ending up with Cosmo the ...Plant-thingy, from the TV show. No love story should ever end with the girl fusing herself with an evil alien, and the guy using a giant laser cannon to kill them both. There were some relationships that ended with heroic sacrifices that were sweet, thoughtful, and well-thought out, and this was not one of them.

She clicked on the newest Sonic fic on the site, and wasn't too surprised at what she saw.

_One day i woke up and i was in sonic world and i was all OMG im a pink hedgehog now like amy! then shadow found me and i kissed him and we got married! We had seventeen beautfiul kids and lived happily ever after BUT WE DIDNT because then eggman tried to kill us and take our kids because im the real ultimate life form not him and our kids were powerful enough to kick sonics but without even having to go into super sol emeralds darkspine mode 3! OMG how will this story turn out?! leave reviews and ill post the next chapter!_

Naomi cradled her heads in her hands, clicked "Post a Review", and wasn't sure where to begin.

_Okay, this is obviously your first time writing anything in the english language, so I'll hold back a few complaints about your abysmal spelling and grammar. Here, let me list everything else you did wrong._

_One, Shadow the hedgehog is not the kind of guy who'd kiss, marry, and have kids with someone he just met._

_Two, there is already a pink hedgehog in the Sonic series. Amy Rose. Saying that your character is like Amy Rose, and implying that it was intentional doesn't mean you can get away with bad writing. Please try to be more original with your choice of species._

_Three, It's not called "Sonic World". Depending on the continuity, it's either Earth, or Mobius._

_Four, "super sol emeralds darkspine mode 3"? No. Just no._

_Five, Seventeen children?! Are you kidding me, seventeen? I doubt you know much about hedgehog physiology, but I assure you, they do not have seventeen kids at once!_

_Six, Finally, that is not a chapter, it's barely a paragraph._

Naomi posted the review, and wasn't too surprised when a rather rude message filled with incorrect grammar came up in response. Naomi looked at it, and saw how the whole thing was written in caps lock and also contained multiple comments about her being jealous, just because the author ended up with Shadow and Naomi didn't. She gave up, and went to the homepage.

She decided to see how her own fics were going. She had written eight fanfics; five of them were on Sonic The Hedgehog, all focused on shipping Shadow with every eligible female character in the series, except Cream. She was spoken for. There were two Pokemon fics, one Ash/Misty fic, and one Gary/Ash fic her best friend had paid her a large amount of money to write. There was also a heavily violent +16-rated Fire Emblem fic her brother had written, but agreed to let her put it up on her profile, as it would get more views that way, and he had no interest in creating an entire profile on a site, just to post one story.

None of them were doing too well, which she found absurd, as they were all well-written, with meaningful plots. Except for Jack's, which was the plot to the first Fire Emblem game, novelised, with the violence turned up to eleven. Or, as one of her friends had said, "Eleven?! It's over 9000!"

Still, he had everyone in-character, and even had a few rather good angst scenes starring Marth. She would have loved it, if the fight scenes didn't go into so much graphic detail. Every single battle he'd had during that game had been put into the story, and the characters matched every move he made in the game, but there was so much blood and gore, she found herself wanting to vomit after every fight scene. It took her a while to get through a story like that, but the emotions and characters were so good, it was worth losing her lunch more times than she could count. One time, when she was with her friends, she joked about how she should make the hideously overweight one read it, as it could help her lose a few hundred stone. The group proceeded to call her a heartless jerk, because there is nothing funny about fat people vomiting, or something. She didn't understand half of what they were saying, and didn't care enough to try. Once they were done, she changed the subject of the conversation to various hot celebrities. She didn't really care about this, as she believed there was no point falling in love with someone you were never going to meet. Still, her friends loved to talk about it, and it amused her to no end to hear her friends absurd pipe dreams about Justin Bieber and Robert Something-Or-Other (The sparkly vampire) fighting to the death over who got to marry her, and have eight kids, before she divorced him, sold her stories to the many gossip magazines out there, and live off his child support checks, and whenever that money wasn't enough, she'd appear on a talk show, and tell the world stupid lies about the celebrity, until his company gave her a huge amount of money in return for shutting up about everything, and never talking about Bieber/Sparkleman again. She'd then become an actress or movie star on TV, and, in interviews, hint that the story is even worse than she said, but the evil company's lawyers aren't letting her say any more on the subject, gaining pity points with her loving audience and fanbase. Maybe she'd purposefully give brain damage to one of her kids, so she could look like a great mother for single-handedly raising a kid she damaged herself. The more pity and love her fans had for her, the less likely they'd be to care about her unforgivably terrible acting.

_God, I have some real idiots for friends._ Naomi thought with a smirk.

She shook her head and chuckled ruefully, and checked her email. She watched a video of some idiots crash a tandem bike into a wall that one of her friends had sent her, and then she came across the website for some newspaper he'd never even heard of before. She was so bored; she started to read the articles. They were pretty boring, and most of them were quite outdated, but it wasn't like she had anything better to do.

A celebrity did something stupid. _So what?_

Justin Bieber was caught kissing his girlfriend. _Who cares?_

Some talentless American comedian was trying to sue a famous British comedian just because they both had the same name. _What a loser._

Terrorists blew something up. _Again, seriously?_

Just as she was about to close the page and go back to watching people fail at bike-riding, one article caught her eye. It must have been recently posted, because it suddenly appeared at the top of the "Newest articles" list. Naomi clicked it, and the article read:

_**32 CHILDREN MISSING, POLICE BAFFLED.**_

_**32 Children have gone missing within the last week, all from different parts of the country. The Police think it may be the work of a Serial Killer; however no evidence of foul play was found at any of the crime scenes. This could mean that the children went willingly, but children become a lot more willing to go with strangers when there's a gun put to their heads.(Pictured Left) The Police are unable to find any connection between any of the children, They are all different ages, from different towns, and of different ethnicities.**_

_**The children usually show up a few days later, dead. What makes things stranger is that they all died from different ways: Some were maimed horrifically (Pictured Below), others died from an unidentifiable poison, and some seem to have just dropped dead with no medical explanation available.**_

_**This could mean the killer had accomplices, or it may just be a large group of parents murdering their children at the same time. The police are investigating all of the parents' homes; searching for any unifying thread that could tie the parents up for good. There is no evidence to support the theory that the parents got together and mutilated their children while covering for each other, but this reporter will keep you updated.**_

Naomi's eyes widened in horror. "Oh my god!"

"This is..." _**Dead.**_

"This is..." _**Serial Killer.**_

"This is..." _**maimed horrifically.**_

"This is boring!" She yelled as she closed the article, and went to a different website.

After half an hour of laughing at lolcats, she was feeling much better. Naomi turned off her laptop, put it away, and decided that since she was up all night for the last few nights reading a book she'd borrowed from the library that was due next Friday, she might as well rest now. Even if it was only 6:12 PM, she didn't really care; she was asleep before her head had hit the pillow.

Thoughts of the badfic and the murders she'd read about were the last thoughts in her conscious mind, before they were replaced by the empty blankness of sleep.

* * *

Naomi awoke slowly and groggily sat up. She was not a morning person, and she had no doubt her long black hair would be in a complete mess. She slowly sat up, and rubbed her eyes.

When she saw that her hand and the rest of her arm had been covered in thick black fur, she screamed.

She got up, now wide awake, and saw that her other arm was the same. Looking down, she saw her entire body was covered in coal-black fur... and she was completely naked.

She screamed even louder.

Naomi looked around, and saw she was in some kind of forest. The grass was slick with dew, and she was in a clearing, with an unobstructed view of the blue cloudless sky. Most people would have taken a moment to gaze at the clouds, or admire the beauty of nature. She didn't care about plants, and probably never would, so this sight meant nothing to her.

She panicked, and started running in a random direction. She wanted to get out of that forest as quickly as she could. She knew what was in forests, and, being from a moderate-sized city, had no interest in being eaten alive by insects, like in that movie where insects eat that girl. She couldn't remember the name of the movie, and at this point, she really didn't care. Wet leaves and vines were smacking her in the face, but she didn't care. She wanted to get out of there as soon as possible.

Eventually, she got out of that forest, and found a small pond full of dark, murky rainwater. She approached the water slowly, terrified of what she might see. Part of her was expecting some kind of impossibly large sea monster to burst out of it and attack her.

She saw a monster in the lake, but it wasn't a sea monster. It was herself.

Naomi hadn't just grown fur; her entire body had changed into some kind of were-panther. Her body was covered in the taut yet strong muscles of a dancer, but they felt like they were much stronger than they looked. Her head, while looking too big for its body, was easily recognisable as a panther's, and yet the fur on her head was much longer, vaguely resembling the black hime-style haircut she had back in her human form, but with her new animal ears poking out of it. Her hazel eyes had become bright gold, with cat pupils, looking cold and merciless despite her complete shock. Instead of actual paws, her hands were like her human hands, delicate and nimble, but with short panther claws on them. Her instincts told her that she could extend them whenever she wanted, but she had no doubt that she wouldn't be caught dead flailing her open hands around like a cat, hoping she'd get lucky and scratch her enemy's face. That fighting "style" was only for girls who were absolutely nothing like her. Still, there was something slightly off about the proportions of her body, like she was some sort of deranged cartoon character. She always hated cartoons. Even as a kid, she preferred to watch nature documentaries, and read books. Ones with no pictures, so she didn't have to put up with those absurd scribblings that the government was so sure that kids liked.

She noticed that she really was naked, and even though her fur covered everything she didn't want people to see, like some sort of fur jumpsuit, her left arm covered her chest out of habit, while her right arm went up to her head and cradled it, and wondered what on earth 616 she'd drunk last night. Her author's mind formulated a plausible theory where she had been at some big party, somebody had spiked her drink with something insanely powerful, and her subconscious mind was showing her this, because it was far more preferable than knowing and seeing what was really happening, and being completely powerless to stop it.

She was interrupted from her idle thoughts by a sudden voice shouting out from behind her. It was loud, and completely bored.

"Yo, Panther-girl. You okay?"

She whipped around, and saw a white-furred monkey-person standing about twelve feet from her. He was wearing a toolbelt, and some shoes made of duct tape, but apart from that, he was just as naked as she was. A quick habitual glance downwards showed her that his fur also covered everything that needed to be covered. She glanced up, and his expression clearly showed that he'd rather be anywhere but here, seeing nothing less than complete boredom in his red eyes.

He noticed her looking at him, and grinned perversely. "So, you like what you see?"

She almost vomited. "Ew, no! I have a boyfriend, and I don't date monkeys!"

His grin grew even wider. "Well, that's kinda racist. Or species-ist. Simian-ist? Whatever. Anyway, what brings a pretty young thing like you out here into these woods?"

Her rage subsided slightly when she was called racist, but was quickly rekindled when he continued hitting on her. "Nothing, I just woke up here!"

He stopped grinning for a moment, and got serious. "Completely naked?"

"Yes!"

His grin returned.

"Not like that, you pervert!" She yelled.

"Whatever." He said, walking towards her. "Say what you want, I don't want to know anything about you cats and your love life. Well, at least this answers why you were screaming so much just then. You came here to get cleaned up, right?"

She screamed in rage, and punched him in the gut.

When he got back up, he took a few steps back, and grinned. "A real panther would have clawed me for that. Or, at least, tried to." He got a rather large spanner out of his belt, and settled into what Naomi guessed was a fighting stance. "So, robot, why don't you tell me who you are and why you're here, or will I get to dismantle you piece by piece?"

"I'm not a robot! I don't even know why I'm here!"

He grinned at her. "Whatever, Android then. I forgot you robots like calling yourself that. Not that it matters, you're going straight to the scrapheap!"

He lunged at her, and swung his spanner wildly. He might not have been that strong, but he was fast, and that spanner was heavy enough to do some serious damage even if it did hit.

But, she was used to fighting people who could dodge almost anything. Her claws extended, and she reached out and grabbed the monkey by the throat. She was just about to disembowel him when he kicked her in the chin, and broke free from her hold, landing on his rear end and shuffling back.

"Alright, I felt that, so you aren't made of metal." The monkey grunted as he got up. "But that doesn't mean you're not a robot. I've heard something about androids covered in synthetic materials that can resemble skin and fur. I've heard over 9000 things about them, to be precise."

Her ears twitched. "What, 9000?" She yelled out of habit. "There's no way that can be right! ...Can it?"

He put his spanner back in his belt, and smiled. "Perfect. This world doesn't have Dragon Ball, and this world has never even heard of that quote. Human, you're one of us. Now... Come with me if you want to live."

"What do you mean, 'one of us'? And I'm not going anywhere with you, so explain what's going on, or..." She grinned as she thought of a suitably funny yet threatening Dragon Ball quote to respond with. "The balls will be inert. Yours, to be precise."

"Heh, nice one. Anyway, I'll explain when we get there. What's your name, anyway?"

"Naomi. What's your na-?"

"Gary. Now, come with me, if you want to live. By the way, sorry about earlier."

She moved towards him and extended her left hand as if she wanted a handshake, but as soon as he got within range, she punched him in the face. When he got up, she grinned at him the way he had. "Apology accepted. Now lead the way."

"Whatever."

* * *

Naomi wasn't sure what she was expecting the base to be, but she wasn't expecting _this._

The way Gary had said "Base"; she was expecting some sort of military operation, with big burly soldiers running around, armed to their animalistic teeth.

Instead, it could be better described as a "Village". A small village of huts made of leaves, twigs and mud. There were several small children running around playing tag, and all of them were some kind of animal. Some kids were wearing nothing but duct tape shoes, and a few weren't even wearing those! She averted her eyes out of habit, with her left arm hiding what was already hidden and followed Gary. He seemed to be pleased with himself that he'd found someone, even if he'd initially suspected of her being a robot. He was treating her more like a guest than a prisoner, which was strange, considering how intent he was on taking her home. Gary led his guest into the largest hut, in the middle of the village, obviously where the leader slept, eat, and lead the organisation.

The inside of the leader's hut was bare, with little decoration besides some basic wooden furniture. There were no kids here, only three more animal-people that appeared to be teenagers. A Fox, a bear and a Lioness. The bear looked at Naomi blankly, and then looked at Gary, raising an eyebrow. She wasn't sure if bears had eyebrows, but this bear-person managed to pull that look off anyway. The lioness wasn't wearing anything either, and seemed too innocent to be affiliated with this organisation. However, they were all wearing rather thick-looking shoes made of duct tape.

However, the Fox was the one that really caught her eye. He was also in the nude, body covered in red fur. He looked about seventeen or eighteen, and he seemed to have two tails. His facial expression was extremely familiar, she just couldn't remember where from.

The Bear spoke first. "Well, Gary, what have you got?"

Gary walked in front of her, and smiled. "New recruit, a human from earth."

"Doesn't look like a human." The bear stated the obvious.

The lioness smiled at him. "Looks like that trip wasn't a total waste, after all, huh?"

"Whatever..." was his response.

"Did you check?" The bear asked.

"Yeah, I used the Nine Thousand method. She passed."

"Oh, the Nine Thousand method? You mean, the one I came up with?" The lioness asked.

"Whatever..."

Naomi felt entirely left out of this conversation. "So, why am I here?"

The fox spoke up suddenly, saying "Nobody knows..." with an air of mysteriousness. Naomi saw something familiar in his expression, but wasn't sure what.

The Bear ignored him, and explained. "Everyone here was originally human. We don't know how or why, but one day, we all wake up somewhere around this area, as these creatures. For survival, we got into a group, which steadily grew as time went on. Every few weeks, there was someone new coming in. Eventually, we found this small village out here. We think it could be some sort of village that had its inhabitants killed off, or it could be some sort of military outpost, if we're in some sort of fourth-world nation where something like this would pass as one. My name is Frank."

"Rin, nice to meet you!" The lioness said, offering a clawed hand for her to shake. "Hey, do you like Anime?"

"Not sure, I haven't really seen many." Naomi said with an embarrassed smile.

"I'm Jack, team strategist. And, I guess you've already met Gary, our mechanic."

"Wait a minute, 'Jack'?"

"Yeah, why?"

"It's me, Naomi!"

The two examined each other, looking for any resemblance to their siblings. There wasn't much resemblance in their bodies, but the voices, posture and facial expression was unmistakeable, to each other. They had spent almost their entire lives together, and they were closer than any other siblings they knew.

"That face, that patented blend of smugness and analyticality-" Naomi said, moving towards Jack slowly.

"Analyticality isn't a word, but whatever." Gary chimed in apathetically. Everyone ignored him.

"Sis?"

"Bro?"

Jack vaulted over a wooden table and ran up to Naomi, and the two hugged, for the first time in months. Back home, they rarely hugged. They might be the closest pair of siblings they knew, but they felt there wasn't any need to be too sappy about it.

"Naomi, I've been here for a whole week, hoping you survived!" Jack said, looking into her eyes. "I've spent every moment worrying about you! Are you okay?"

"I'm fine! How are you? What are you? And anyway, I fell asleep before you did, I should have ended up here before you!"

"How can you be so sure I even slept?" He said with a smirk. He slept just as often as she did, which meant he didn't sleep much.

"Well, you are here, aren't you?"

"Yes, I'm here. Sis... I'm here." He said, closing his eyes.

"Oh Kami," Rin yelled, clasping her hands together, "It's so adorable! A brother and sister, reunited at last!"

"Whatever." Gary said, and then grinned. "Now kiss!"

Jack and Naomi let go, awkwardly backed away from each other, and each fixed Gary with their own death glares.

"Alright, whatever, I'm going. If you need me, I'll be in my hut, where I should have been all day." Gary said as he turned to leave, and was out the door before anyone could object, not that they were going to at this point.

"So, Naomi... You're a panther."

"Yeah. And you're a fox. With two tails."

"Three, three tails." He said as he turned around and bent over, showing her his third tail. It was in the middle, like the three propellers of a three-bladed helicopter.

"Yeah, three..." Rin said, staring.

"Rin," Jack said while turning around, "please explain to Naomi why I have three tails."

"Hai!" Rin said, happy to be showing off her Otaku knowledge, "He's not a Fox, he's a Kitsune. Look at his tails. It's a creature from Japanese mythology; they're like foxes, but way se- I mean, cooler. As they get older, they get more tails, and achieve immortality when they get their ninth tail."

"Immortality, cool." Naomi said, taking this all in.

"Yeah! They're supposed to be able to control minds and stuff, but Jack hasn't figured out how to do that yet."

An awkward silence hung heavy in the air as Naomi realised the theory she'd been crafting had just been thrown out the window, and off a cliff, where it hit every tree on the way down and landed on a nerdy lioness, which tore her theory to pieces. And then ate what was left of it, and announced the metaphor-meal's deliciousness to the world, in loud, high-pitched Japanese.

Naomi facepalmed again, realising that her metaphors were getting just as bad as Jack's.

"Well," Frank said slowly, trying to break the awkwardness. "Naomi, there isn't much room left in the village, so you can either sleep in Gary's hut, or Jack's."

"I want to sleep with Jack!" Naomi blurted out, and could hear Gary's perverted laughter coming from outside and slowly fade away as he walked off; satisfied that today hadn't been a complete waste of time.

"Well, I hate that guy." She said, stating the obvious.

"Hey, don't be so quick to judge him." Frank stated. "He might seem like a bit of a jerk at first, but once he gets to know you, and you get to know him, you'll realise... he's an even bigger jerk. But, he's good with machines, so we keep him anyway."

"My brother, Jack, he's smart, can't we use him instead?"

"No. Thanks for the compliment, but while I am a genius, I'm more suited to strategies, tactics, deduction and planning. On the other hand, Gary is a brilliant mechanic, and he's made quite a lot of useful devices so far, even with the scraps we've found here and there. Like that water purification device near the lake at the back of our camp, and this pocket computer, that actually has better processing power than my laptop back home."

To illustrate the point, Jack held up his pocket computer. He turned it on, and it instantly went into the Blue Screen Of Death.

Rin grabbed the pocket computer from his hand, and smiled. "Don't worry, I'll go kick Gary's one-tailed butt and make him fix that."

Jack put a hand on Rin's shoulder, and smiled. "Thanks sweetie."

If this was an anime, she would have had a giant nosebleed, there would be cartoon hearts in the background, and everything would be sparkly. Instead, she just stumbled back a bit, blushing fiercely.

"You like him?" Naomi asked with a raised eyebrow. "Woah, it's a sign of the apocalypse. Anyway, what about all that hacking, and stuff?"

"I'm a professional gamer, but hacking is my hobby. And no, you can't hack something without any computers to use. It's like trying to fly, by jumping off a cliff, and three jars of peanut butter is all you've got. Speaking of flight, I still haven't figured out how to do that yet either. Flying with tails, I mean, not flying with peanut butter. I've been trying since I got here, but it doesn't seem to work for me. Then again, it is a complete violation of the laws of physics, so I doubt even a real Kitsune could pull that off."

Naomi didn't even bother asking about the metaphor, she'd leaned long ago that they weren't meant to make sense to anyone but him, and those close to him. She often wondered if this was intentional or not, but right now, with everything that was going on, she was just didn't care.

"So, Sis, I guess I'd better show you where our hut is, huh?" Jack asked.

"Wait, aren't we going to go meet everyone else here?"

"No need, we're going to have one of those campfire-meeting things. After we're done with the usual storytelling, to 'Raise our spirits', there'll be a meeting where we discuss our next move. Or rather... I'll say our next move, and it goes to a vote between the senior members. As for Rin and Gary, one will object, and the other one will support my idea completely, simply because the other one didn't. I'm not sure what the other seniors will say, but I'm pretty sure they'll take my side. After all, it is the only possible move to make. So, come with me, I'll show you where out hut is."

Jack slowly walked out the door, his three tails flailing about. Rin stared, blushing so hard it was visible through her fur. Naomi ignored her, and followed Jack to their hut.

Frank leered over at Rin.

"You like him."

Rin freaked out, panicking and waving her arms about. "No! It's not like I like him, or anything! Baka!"

Frank shrugged. "Oh, alright. But Gary's going to be upset, when you tell him you're over him."

"I don't like Gary either!"

"Riiiight."

"Oh, look at the time," She said, looking at the broken pocket computer. "Oh right, I have to go ask Gary to repair this. _Politely._ Kthxbai!"

She skipped out of the hut, leaving Frank alone. He lay down on the sofa with a grin, wondering how tonight's meeting was going to go when the 'Senior Members' started arguing.


	2. Let's gather 'round the campfire!

"Hey, Jack..." Naomi asked Jack, standing to the left of him. The two had just left the leader's hut, and were going past a long stretch of similar-looking huts.

"Yeah, Sis?"

"Back then, what did you mean by 'Senior Members'?"

"Well, you know how people are showing up suddenly, getting turned into animal-people, and ending up here? Well, there doesn't seem to be an age limit on interdimensional transportation. The eldest person here, Frank, is nineteen, twenty next August. But there are people here that are much younger than him. The current youngest kid here is a six-year old puppy; I think he's some kind of Labrador. This group started off as Frank, Rin, Gary, and a few kids, but the number quickly grew. Anyone over the age of thirteen is considered eligible to become senior, but you need to pull off something awesome to actually get the title. Technically, there isn't an actual age limit, but the current youngest senior is Rin, aged sixteen. You're four months older than her. Gary is also sixteen, but he's about seven months older than her."

A young Beagle ran past, chased by a Squirrel. The Squirrel effortlessly caught the Beagle, tagged him, and ran off in the opposite direction.

"Really? The way he was acting, I'd have thought he was middle-aged, about thirty-something."

Jack had a good laugh at that, then stopped when he realised where he was.

"We're here, Sis."

The two went inside their hut, and the interior wasn't much to look at. There was some wooden furniture around, including a desk and table. There were three rooms; a dinner hall with room for eight, a bedroom, and a large empty room that was originally for storing weaponry and ammunition, but was now empty. The hut was very spacious, but the empty furniture only made the place feel more empty and lonely. Most of the other huts in the village were like this one, and the people living there were given permission to use the storage room however they wanted. When they first got there, the storage room was mostly packed with vacuum-packed sealed containers of emergency rations, but all of the weapons were removed before anyone got there.

"So, Jack, this hut is ours?"

"Yeah. Most of the other seniors have a bunch of kids in their huts living with them, but I got my hut all to myself."

"Why?"

Jack grinned evilly, and Naomi could see every single one of his sharp teeth. "Oh, I can't imagine why, but they seem to be terrified of me."

"Bro, you jerk!" Naomi shouted, playfully punching him in the arm. "Haven't you got anything better to do than scare a bunch of kids?"

"Oh, that's nothing. You should see what Gary did to get rid of his kids. He's only got one kid left now, a nine-year old boy named Sam that he'd weirdly protective of, though I can't understand why. Anyway, he convinced the other seniors to let him have that kid. Because of his species, none of the other cabins would accept him living there."

"What's his species, and why would that jerk Gary want him?"

"Skunk."

"Eep."

"Exactly. Thanks to that kid, he now has his whole hut to himself, apart from that kid, who spends most of the time outside anyway. His entire hut is filled with scrap metal, and he's actually put the kid's bunk bed in the dinner hall, so that he could stay up for nights on end making stuff without having to worry about interrupting that kid's sleep. Funny thing is, he didn't even have to do all this, he's so important to this team that he could probably get an entire hut to himself if he asked. Instead, he did all that. The only advantage I can see is how he's made sure that now, nobody will ever drop in to visit him, and interrupt his ...machinations!"

Jack laughed at his own joke, and Naomi tried, and failed, to suppress a giggle.

"That was terrible!" She said with a grin.

"I know! Hey, want to play a game... wait; I think Rin and Gary have my computer."

"Yeah, they're fixing it, remember?"

"Oh yeah, that. I think I've got a chess set somewhere in the storage room, want to go play that?"

"Hell no, you always win at that. At least with video games, I... 'improve', as you put it."

"But you do improve! Every time you play, it always takes me slightly longer... for me to kick your butt without even trying!"

"What time is it?" She asked, changing the subject before she hit him. Jack was probably the only guy she knew that she had never hit, and she really didn't want today to be the day she broke her winning streak.

"Not sure." He answered. "I had a watch app on my computer, but, you know. Repairs."

"Yeah." She said, as the two went into the bedroom on the right. "So, can I ask you something?"

"Sure."

"WHY ARE WE HERE, WHERE ARE WE, AND WHY THE BLOODY HELL AM I A PANTHER?!"

Jack's expression never changed, even in the face of her rage. He knew her better than anyone else, and when she was screaming, it meant she wasn't really that angry. Well, she was angry, but not dangerously angry. It wasn't dangerous for him, anyway. When she starts talking coldly, showing no emotion, that's when people should worry.

"Sis, nobody knows why we are here, or where we are." He explained. "All we know is that something has sent all of us here, and we've banded together for survival. So far, we've fought off a few wild animals that attacked our camp, and we are currently trying to decide what to do next."

"Well, what do you want to do next?"

He lay down on his bed, smiling. Unlike the others, it was not a bunk bed. "I think the next thing we should do, is try and find the nearest city or town; get some answers as to where we are, and figure things out from there. When we first got here, there were a lot of those army emergency rations, and we ate those. However, we're running out, and we can't stay here forever."

"Why is your bed different?" Naomi asked, noticing Jack's bed.

"Huh? Oh, right. Since I thought I'd be living alone- Forever alone!" He yelled, saw Naomi facepalm, then continued. "I detached the top bunk from my bed and put it in storage. I always preferred the bottom bunk anyway. If you want, I can do the same to yours."

"No thanks, I like going on top."

The two shared loud laughter at how that sounded. Naomi fell to the ground, and laughed harder than she had in weeks, maybe even months. After everything that had happened, it just felt so good to finally be able to laugh.

"Anyway," Naomi said, getting up off the floor. "What's up with Rin?"

"She wishes she was Japanese, she loves anime, she loves swords, she's... actually pretty cool. If she was human, I might think she was hot. When she's not being Frank's megaphone-" He paused when he saw Naomi smirk. "That's not what it sounds like, I meant, he says stuff and she says it louder! Anyway, when she's not doing that, and not fighting with Gary, she'll usually be playing with the kids. They love her, they see her as some sort of temporary replacement for their mother. She'll often tell them stories, taken directly from the Animes she watches. Some of them are good, some of them are weird, and a few of them, I've seen, like that fighting one, that one that's like the fighting one but with swords, and that one that's like the fighting one but with female sailors that shoot lasers made of love and friendship."

She looked at him oddly.

"Sometimes, when I'm at my friends' houses, they have their TVs on." He explained. "Sometimes, we watch the shows. One time, I dated this girl who absolutely adored that show."

"Yeah, that's... that's great. Anyway, what did you mean by 'Wild animals'?"

"Well, we were-animal-people-things aren't the only things in this forest. There are a lot of regular animals out here as well, and we've mostly been killing and eating them. We don't eat the humanoid ones, just the regular animals, like the ones we have back home."

"Bro, where we lived, the closest thing to a wild animal were those squirrels that kept eating our rubbish."

"Yeah, I know. By 'Back home', I meant earth, which this place is obviously not. Just look around, can't you just sense that something is off?"

"What do you mean? Besides the were-animal-people-things, of course."

"I mean, I can just... sense something. Something's wrong. We're really far from home, and this is certainly not earth."

"How can you tell?"

"My kitsune senses are tingling!"

If this was an anime, Naomi would be falling on her face in a humorous fashion. Instead, she facepalmed.

"Yeah." Naomi said flatly. "That's just great. So, what else can you do?"

"Heh, okay, I don't have Kitsune senses. But I can do this. Check it out."

He breathed in deeply, closed his eyes and put a hand on his heart to focus, and when he spoke again, everything he said sounded much more attractive.

"I'm too shirtless for my shirt, too shirtless for my shirt, so shirtless it hurrrts!" He sang, rubbing his hands down his chest as he sung. Normally, she would have hated this, but he knew that this technique could make anything seem good.

Naomi sat still, unable to move or think clearly, until he stopped, and her mind came rushing back to her so hard she could feel it.

"Do you like it?" He asked with a grin.

"What was that?!"

"Well, I think it might be part of being an animal-person-thing. I think it involves pheromones, or something. As far as I can tell, nobody else here can do that. Maybe I'm the only one here with the focus needed to activate something that most animals can't control, and they have to wait until it feels like activating. Or maybe it's just a Fox thing, or a Kitsune thing, or whatever I am."

"Jack, please, for as long as either of us live, NEVER DO THAT TO ME AGAIN."

"I'm guessing you didn't enjoy it, then?"

"Actually, I enjoyed it more than I should have."

"Well," Jack said after a quick look out of the window, trying to change the subject as it had suddenly ventured into uncomfortable territory, "I believe it's time for our meeting."

"Are you kidding me? It was midday a few minutes ago!"

"See for yourself. Time doesn't work normally here."

Naomi looked out, and saw that somehow, entire hours had passed without her noticing. The sky was a solid black offset by the full moon, hanging in the air. Countless stars were twinkling brightly; there were more stars out than she'd ever seen before.

Jack's voice distracted her from her thoughts. "Beautiful, right? Either we're far away from any major cities, or this world doesn't have any pollution from cars and planes. Or both. Anyway, this means we have a clear, unobstructed view of the night sky. I never used to be the type to think much of stars; they're just faraway suns we can never reach. A constant reminder of what humanity can never achieve. But on my first night here, when I saw the sky so clearly, even I had to admit it was a breathtaking sight. By the way, nobody knows how or why, but here, the moon is full every night."

"But then how do the tides-"

"I just said, nobody knows. Still, it gives us something to look at. When I first got here, I was alone. Completely alone, in a forest, with no technology to speak of. It's a good thing I was a fox, or I would have been completely doomed. It took a few days before this organisation found me, and when they did, Frank said I looked like something out of the Rambo movies. He likes them; he's seen them all far too many times."

Naomi had a sudden mental image of Jack's human form, trying, and failing, to look like the guy from the Rambo posters. She hadn't seen the movies, but she and pretty much everyone she knew had seen at least one poster or trailer in their lifetime. She was surprised to find that the mental image was not completely unpleasant. In fact, it was almost enjoyable-

"Shouldn't we go to that meeting now?" She said quickly.

"Sure." Jack said, getting off the bed. "Lead the way."

"I don't know where it is!"

"I know. Come with me, it's this way."

* * *

The meeting was taking place around a rather large campfire in the middle of the village. The fire was made using leftover wood, and was being energetically made by a gecko that seemed to be enjoying the fire a bit too much. Everyone was sitting on wooden stools, and they seemed designed for creatures with tails. Naomi looked around, and saw Gary, Rin and Frank sitting together. Frank's eyes were closed, and he seemed to be waiting for just the right moment to speak. Most of the people there were arguing with each other, and the sounds of the kids screaming turned into one large cacophony of high-pitched continuous noise.

"Well, what do you think we should be-"

"Guys, I think my arm might be-"

"I head we aren't on earth anymore, is that-"

"BURN, BABY, BURN!"

"Let's gather 'round the campfire, and sing our-"

"Don't be dumb, we're just really far away from here, and those jerks in charge have no idea where-"

"Hey, Jack." Naomi whispered, ignoring the choir of home, she was once in a heavy metal band named Choir of Chaos with a few of her friends from school. She played lead guitar, and was the lead singer in their more angry-sounding songs.

"Yeah, Naomi?"

"Who are those birds over there?"

"Team Wings. Those three are our best fighters, and the only birds we have. They've gotten themselves into a team, and they get more rations, and a hut to themselves, in return for... whatever it is they do. They're supposed to be used on any rescues we need, but they insist they are better at fighting. Their leader, Carl the Falcon, is an idiot, and the other one, Abigail the Hawk, isn't much better. But their Crow, Jess, she's pretty smart. She plans out all of their missions, and whenever her team actually listen to her, they're pretty much unstoppable. I've played a few games with her, and every game always ends in a complete stalemate."

"Wow, she's that good?"

"Only at the strategy games. Everything else, I can beat her at while blindfolded." He said, and she knew from personal experience that when he said he could bat someone blindfolded, it wasn't just an expression. "She's even worse than you. Wait, no, you're better than her. Yeah, that sounds better."

"Thanks, I think. Anyway, these people are loud."

"You don't say!"

The two stopped talking after that, and tried to listen to the crowd.

"Quiet, dog. Our leaders are great people, and they know what they are-"

"Hello, people, my arm?! Seriously, I'm pretty sure it's not supposed to bend this way! Does anyone even-"

"I ain't no dog, and they ain't my leader, so shut-"

"I am a firestarter, a twisted firestarter! Ahahahahaha, fire fire fire!"

"But you are a dog, you're a bulldog, and a dumb one, at that."

"Anyone got any tacos?"

"So what if I am, you're a skunk, so shut the-"

"Our C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E S-O-N-G, song!

"GUYS, MY ARM IS-"

"You mention my species again, and I swear I'll do to you what skunks are famous for doing!"

"And if you think that you can sing it faster, then you're wrong!"

"Not if I kill you first, you annoying little-"

Gary seemed to have somehow teleported, because he was suddenly not at Frank's side. Instead, was smashing his spanner into the side of that bulldog's head. The racket stopped for a few moments while everyone saw the attack, and then the meeting devolved into a full-on brawl. Naomi stood back-to-back with Jack, who predicted and dodged every attack with effortless ease. Meanwhile, Naomi punched anything that got close, and whoever she hit stayed down. The two made a rather good team, but neither of them was really trying to hurt their enemies, just knock them out until the fight ends.

Frank and Rin were still seated, pretending not to notice.

A Crow cawed loudly and flew up, holding Gary's spanner in her talons. She hovered just out of Gary's reach, taunting him and making rude gestures with her arms until somebody's thrown chair struck her from the sky. A Hawk and Falcon flew up, dived at where the chair had been thrown from, and started attacking everyone in the area.

Suddenly, Frank got up, and nodded to Rin, who got up with him, and inhaled deeply.

"IGIARI!" She roared, and Jack recognised it as the Japanese word for Objection used in the Japanese version of Phoenix Wright. He didn't speak Japanese, but he liked to figure out what Japanese video game characters were saying. If there was one thing he hated, it was when there was something he didn't know. Everyone immediately stopped fighting, and turned to look at Rin, who was standing proudly with her hands on her hips.

"Thank you, Rin." Frank said with a smile. "Now, guy with the broken arm, get our medic to look at that."

"I haz a name, you jherk." A fifteen-year old Siamese cat shouted with an extremely thick, terrible, and completely fake French accent. However, it could have been a fake German accent, or a fake Russian accent. Or maybe just the world's weirdest speech impediment. It was too awful to tell.

"Perhaps you do, but until you drop that fake accent, we're either going to call you Our Medic, or Lolcat. Pick one, and when this meeting is over, tell Rin, she'll tell me. Abigail, get Gary's spanner from Jess, and give it back to him. You, the Gecko, get away from the fire, it's enough for now. Lolcat, you may also want to look at that bulldog, I believe he might have some damage." He sat down, and steepled his fingers/claws. "Now, I suppose you are all wondering why I gathered you here tonight."

The crowd erupted into another loud cacophony of voices, and was quickly silenced by Rin roaring something in Japanese that Jack didn't recognise, most likely because it wasn't from a game he played.

"But first!" Frank said, trying to lighten the mood. "Anyone know any good stories?

"She stood still, her mind buzzing from the adrenaline, the thrill, the sheer rush from murdering the one man who was responsible for all of her pain!"

Naomi was currently telling a story that she was making up on the spot, and if the fear and horror on the kid's faces were an accurate way to tell how well she was doing, then she was doing brilliantly.

"The man's blood dripped from her face, down her arms, down to the meat cleaver in her hand, dripping down and joining the growing pool of blood on the floor. She tightened her grip on the cleaver, and slashed again! It caught him right on his throat, and his blood squirted out like a broken faucet, coating her face with the sanguine life fluid. She licked her lips, tasting the delicious coppery blood. She gazed at the man's lifeless body, but she still felt rage and hatred inside her. She let out a vicious, feral screech that radiated out to the heavens, and slashed and chopped until the once-proud, but inattentive businessman had been reduced to nothing but an unrecognisable pile of limbs and protruding bones."

Naomi looked around, sadistically savouring the horror everyone was showing, and continued.

"She gazed upon the hideous, mutilated corpse, and grinned wildly. She had finally done it; she had finally murdered the man who had given her so much pain, so much sorrow, every day of her life! She inhaled deeply, and shouted out to his lifeless body:"

"Soyves you wight for fergetting our annivoysawy!" She yelled out in her best attempt at a Brooklyn accent. "Ya god-daynged joyk!"

The crowd sat in shocked, horrified silence. Jack started applauding, and everyone else nervously joined in.

"That was very... detailed." Frank said, eyes widened from shock.

"Yeah..." Rin agreed nervously.

"Well, I think that's enough stories for now." Frank said, trying to push the disturbing story to the back of his mind.

The children gave a simultaneous "Awwww!"

"Now now," Rin said in her best motherly tone. "We're sorry, but there's just no time left."

"Tell us one of your stories!" A young beagle shouted out.

"Yeah, the other girl was scary." Said a slightly older badger.

"She's my sister." Jack pointed out, grinning evilly.

"You're scary too!" The beagle retorted.

"Well, there might be some time left. Fine, I'll tell you a story." Rin said, smiling when she heard the kids cheering. She stood on a nearby chair, and began.

"Well this is a story, entitled 'The epic of Jojishi the epic fighting fighter: An epic of epic epicness!'.

This was a rather odd title for a story, but for Rin, it was possibly the most normal-sounding story title she'd ever come up with.

"A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, there lived a young boy, with really spikey hair. His name was Jojishi. Jojishi wanted to be the strongest fighter ever, even though he was really fat, so he met a grumpy old man. This old man was very grumpy, because nobody was awesome any more. Jojishi showed the old man how awesome he was, by beating his cup-stacking record. The old man sold him some cards, and taught him how to play a children's card game. They spent a few days playing that game, until Jojishi won! The old man then gave Jojishi a magic necklace that could make him older and stronger, but it wore off after a few hours. He also gave Jojishi a portable table to play the children's card game on, and magic leather pants that made him very fast, and tripled his awesomeness level whenever he wore them. The old man also told Jojishi to go to space, and ask the fighting gods for more power, when he was powerful enough to be allowed into the fighting gods' realm. So, Jojishi travelled across the land, searching far and wide, because the old man said 'Each person must understand the power that's inside!' So, every challenge across the path, with courage he did face. He fought everyone, became the best, and claimed his rightful place. But one day, he met a very young boy. He said he was the world's youngest detective. He was very sad, and he fought Jojishi using a giant robot powered by his own misery. They fought, and it was awesome. Jojishi used his giant sword, and he was so powerful that his sword caught on fire, from over-exposure to pure awesomeness!"

The Gecko screamed his approval at the top of his voice.

Rin went on, smiling. "Jojishi fought the detective, and the fight was awesome! The robot tried to punch Jojishi with his giant fist, because the robot's fist had a bunch of drills on it. But those leather pants made Jojishi faster than the giant robot, and he easily dodged the attack, and destroyed the robot by slashing it in half with his giant sword on fire! The sad detective was even sadder, but Jojishi told the detective that true power didn't come from misery, or giant drills. It came from believing in yourself, never giving up, pure awesomeness, and understanding the power that's inside! Even though Jojishi had never used a sword on fire before in his life, he was actually very good at it! He asked the detective what his name was, and he said it was Conan the barbarian. He told Jojishi that he didn't really want to be a barbarian; he just couldn't decide whether to become a barber, or librarian. So, he gave up both, and became a detective instead. But, he kept the name, because it sounded cool. He wanted to become the world's best detective, and he was investigating a rather odd case involving many random, unconnected deaths. So, Conan and Jojishi travelled the world together, and found the problem's source: A crazy man with a magic book that kills people when he writes their name in it! Jojishi and Conan fought the crazy man, but they were too late, because the crazy man wrote their names in the evil book!"

The crowd gasped.

"But it turned out they were okay, because neither of them had last names, so they were safe from the book's evil power. Jojishi asked the crazy man why he tried to kill anyone, and the crazy man told him that it was so that he wouldn't have to be so sad about being the weakest and dumbest man alive, because he'd use the evil book to kill everyone better than him! Jojishi told the crazy man that you became strong by training hard and defeating enemies in epic battles, not relying on some magic book to do all the work for you! The crazy man ate his evil book, got three swords, told them that his name was Heta, and promised that he would travel the world with him, to become the greatest swordsman of all time! Together, the three of them would become the best!"

Rin punched the air, and the crowd cheered.

"So, they travelled across the world, and found an evil merchant who was buying ships cheaply, and selling them at an unreasonably high price! This unforgiveable act of villainy was so evil that Jojishi blew up the merchant with a laser made of his unconquerable fighting spirit, and stole his best boat. Jojishi, Conan and Heta sailed across the ocean, looking for people to fight, cool stuff to find, anything else to do. They also discovered that Jojishi had a condition called Awesomnia, where he could never sleep at night unless he had done something incredibly awesome that day. Eventually, they found a bunch of evil scientists hurting animals, and trying to fuse animals with people to make their soldiers stronger, and use the animals in battle! The evil scientists fused a hippy with a lizard and a plant, and created a monster that could control plants! The monster, named Hora, broke free from its cage, with Jojishi's help, and the good guys destroyed the scientists, and everything evil that they had ever made, except for one thing. A gigantic space rocket! The evil villains had planned to make an army, and use the rockets to fly into space, and conquer the entire universe, saving earth for last!"

"Auntie Rin?" A young Labrador asked. "Why were the evil scientists going to save earth for last?"

"I was just getting to that." Rin pointed out. "If the evil scientists had already conquered the rest of the universe first, then they could build lots of robots and missiles on other planets, and build them out of the materials they find on the other planets. This way, it would be easy for them to take over earth, because it would only be earth, against the combined might of every other planet in the universe! Now, here's what happened next. Jojishi remembered what the old man said to him, about going into space and meeting the fighting gods. Jojishi thought that he was already powerful enough, so he was going to fight the fighting gods instead. He asked his friends if they wanted to come with him, and they agreed. Conan always wanted to solve the mystery of whether the fighting gods were real, and if they really were as good at fighting as the old stories said. Heta blamed the fighting gods for the time he used the book of evil death, because they gave it to him, and he was angry about being used like that. Hora was created by scientists who thought the fighting gods were just a myth, and he was going to love proving them wrong by meeting the fighting gods, and fighting with them."

"Auntie Rin?" A Squirrel asked. "Are the fighting gods real?"

"In this story, they are." Rin answered. "So, the good guys get on the rocket, and flew into space! Conan was the driver, because he used the internet to find out how to fly rockets. They flew past lots of planets, and ended up in the realm of the fighting gods! Everyone fought the fighting gods, and the fight was so awesome that Jojishi's hair got even spikier, and changed colour. He shot lasers made of pure awesomeness, and became the new ultimate supreme king god of fighting! Just as Jojishi was about to ascend the stairs of awesomeness and put on the crown of awesomeness and the cape of awesomeness, while sitting on the golden throne of awesomeness and wielding the sceptre of awesomeness, using the combined awesomeness of himself and all of the awesome items to transform into his True Ultimate Awesome Form 3, become the ultimate king of the fighting gods, the old man showed up again. Conan asked the old man how he got here so quickly, and the old man told the good guys that he was the ultimate king of the fighting gods before him, and he was just looking for his replacement, because his time was almost up. Every ten thousand years, the ultimate king of the fighting gods must step down from his, or her, throne, and make a new fighting god the ultimate king in his, or her, place. The old man smiled warmly for the first time in years, and told Jojishi that he had truly become the best, like no-one ever was. He really had understood the power that was inside! The old man said that the leather pants he had given Jojishi were actually regular leather pants all along, and they had no special powers. They only made him faster because leather pants were awesome, and Jojishi was half-human, half awesomian. Awesomians were an alien race that became more powerful if they were awesome, and Jojishi was the most awesome Awesomian that ever awesomed. His father, the Awesomian, was also the king of Awesomia, making Jojishi the warrior prince of Awesomia, and heir to the throne. The old man bowed down to Jojishi, and Jojishi completed the awesome transformation, growing giant golden wings made of pure awesomeness. He had truly become the best fighter ever! He transferred some of his awesome power to his friends, and they went back to earth, where their ultimate awesomeness allowed them to live out their dreams, and become the best! And so, children, the moral of this story is, if you believe in yourself and never give up on your dreams, then one day, you can be awesome!"

The crowd applauded wildly, and Rin bowed like a person on a stage. "Try and beat that!" She whispered to Naomi when she walked past her.

"Brilliant!" Frank yelled. "Absolutely brilliant!"

"Yeah!" Jack agreed, clapping along.

"People!" Gary said, checking his spanner for any damage. "Or animals. Whatever, that story was great! Now, Frank, let's get that meeting over with."

Frank inhaled deeply, and began. "We have been here for a few months, with little progress being made as to figuring out where we are, or finding anywhere else we could live."

"Why does it matter?" An eleven-year old beagle shouted, standing on his chair to be seen. "We have a home, why should we move?"

"Because, young pup," Jack said with a smirk, "You might think we can stay here forever, but we cannot. The forest is not enough to sustain a population this large, and unless we start killing off unnecessary people," He shot a vicious look at the only three birds there, "we can't stay here forever. Our supplies are running low, and the village is getting very crowded. I suggest we leave here, and find somewhere else we can live, possibly some sort of city."

"City?! There ain't no cities in a world full of animals!" The bulldog said, getting up, cradling his aching head with a paw."

"And yet there is an abandoned village in the middle of nowhere, presumably for military purposes, or refugees, or, perhaps, A CIVILISATION? Remember, where there's a city, there's bound to be at least one library of some sort-."

"A Liberry?" A Falcon mispronounced, flying up so that everyone could see him. "Why'd you want a liberry?

"It's pronounced 'Library', not Li-Berry!" Naomi yelled.

"Thanks." Jack said. "Now listen, the reason we want a library, is so that we can research where this place is, see if this even is earth, which I think it isn't, and try and find a way back home."

"If there is a way back home." The Labrador said sadly, turning away and getting down from the chair.

"Awwww!" Rin screeched, running over to the Labrador and hugging him tightly, her height forcing his head straight into her chest. "You're so kawaii when you're sad!" The Labrador would have objected, but then he realised what she was doing, and decided to keep quiet and enjoy the hug.

"Whatever." Gary said, trying to avoid looking at the two. She never said that _he_ was kawaii when he was sad. He had no clue what that meant, but it sounded pretty good.

"Yeah, that's... that's just great." Jack said, wondering if anyone else understood what she was saying. He picked up some Japanese, from playing the Japanese version of games when they came out in Japan months before they came out in the UK, but he didn't know enough to hold a full conversation in that language. "So who's with me?"

Most of the crowd cheered, and Frank seemed a bit annoyed. "No, you're not going. We are safe here, there's enough food for everyone, and nobody has to die. We'll just lower everyone's ration, and send more people out hunting. We'll eat berries, fruit, wild animals, anything. If we do this, we should be able to survive much longer. Besides, what if there are no cities, and we're just leaving our safety and shelter, to go on a wild goose chase?"

"I'm a Goose!" A high-voiced kid shouted while jumping up.

"OBJECTION! Do you have any evidence to support this claim?"

"Hey, I'm totally a Goose!"

"Not you, our leader!" Jack said, getting annoyed.

"The Fox is right, _oh great and fearless leader_." Carl the Falcon said, and everyone seemed shocked that the two were agreeing on something.

"Those two agreed on something?" the Labrador said, with his mouth wide open.

"It's a sign of the apocalypse!" The goose yelled.

Frank sighed. "No it's not."

Gary smiled. "I agree with Jack."

Rin jumped up and said, "I don't!"

Naomi grinned. "I also agree with Jack."

Carl smiled, and yelled out "Team Wings agrees with me, so that's me, God-bird, Smart-ass, Fox-boy, Psychomi, and the Grease monkey, against _our fearless leader_, the Lion Queen, and possibly Lolcat. I don't know if anyone here knows what that means, but you've just been outvoted!"

"Smart-ass?!"

"Psychomi?!"

"Grease monkey? Whatever."

"Lion Queen?!"

"Heh, I got the best name." Abagail said proudly.

"Fine!" Frank yelled, throwing his hands up in the air. "Tomorrow morning, we'll send out scouts to search the area for any cities or towns nearby. Abigail, you're with Rin."

Rin started a torrent of extremely angry-sounding Japanese, while Abigail darkly muttered "Lord, give me strength."

Frank went on with the team assignments, ignoring them. "Gary, you're with Carl."

"Whatever." Gary said.

"The Grease monkey... he'll do." Carl shrugged.

"Jack, you're with Jess, and Naomi, you're with Lolcat."

"NEZER! I VOULD RAZER DIE ZAN ZPEND ENOZAR MINOOTE VIV ZIZ-"

"Shut up!" Naomi screamed into the Siamese cat's face, and he did.

Jack smirked at Jess, and she smirked back.

"So," Frank began, "Good luck in your search tomorrow. This meeting has ended, goodnight!"

"Hey, wait!" Jack yelled.

"What?" Frank yelled louder.

"Does anyone else hear drums?"


	3. Robots, Aliens, and Bears, Oh My!

"Does anyone else hear drums?"

When Jack asked that, everyone went silent, trying to hear what he could.

"He's right!" The Labrador shouted, and quickly sniffed the air.

"Wait, those aren't drums..." Jack said, recognizing the sound from somewhere. He was just about to say something, when one of the huts burst into flames, and all hell broke loose.

An army of small, round orange spheres of scrap metal with short arms and legs ran out through the bushes with inhuman synchronisation. With their fat orange bodies, round eyes, short limbs and the absurd smile painted on beneath their eyes, they would have looked comical, if it wasn't for the dangerous-looking weapons in their hands. Some were armed with some sort of unrecognisable gun; others had sharp-looking pieces of scrap metal that could probably pass for swords or axes. They ran towards the inhabitants of the village, with only one thought in their cheaply made robotic minds.

_Kill._

Jack and Naomi quickly settled into their back-to-back combination and fought off a few robots, but broke formation when they saw the robots were attacking the younger children first. They separated, and tried to destroy the robots as quickly as they could.

Naomi instinctively extended her claws, slashed at a nearby robot, and was surprised when her claws sliced right through the metal and wires like a hot knife through butter. She grinned, and sliced apart every robot she saw.

Jack ran into a nearby cluster of robots, quickly became surrounded, and smiled when he realised all of the ones attacking him had guns. They shot at the same time, and it was laughably easy for him to stay in the middle, let them shoot at him, then dodge at the last moment, making all of the robots shoot each other.

Naomi noticed a large spanner smashing down on a nearby robot, and saw Gary there, looking deadly serious. She looked back, and saw the campfire had been extinguished, as the burning huts provided more than enough illumination. Most of the children were now gathered in a circle, with Frank and Rin doing their best to protect them. Rin was wielding two burning pieces of sharp-looking wood like katanas, and doing surprisingly well.

_Remind me never to build my village out of leaves, twigs and wood and mud._ Naomi thought coldly.

Team Wings was having fun, working together to cut a metallic swath through the neverending robot army. The robots might not have been too hard to destroy, but they were far too many of them, and they just kept coming.

_We aren't going to be defeated honourably,_ Jack realised. _We are going to be trampled to death._

Jack disarmed a nearby robot that came at him with a hastily-made scrap-metal sword. He waited until the perfect moment, then snapped off the robot's right arm. The arm lifelessly dropped its sword, and Jack grabbed it, and sliced the robot into pieces with its own sword by spinning multiple times. Jack admired his work, and then the poorly-forged metal sword broke apart in his hands. He looked closer at the wreckage, and noticed that the robot was also cut from where his tails had hit it, when he spun.

He experimentally sliced through another robot with his tails, using a forward flip to bring down as much force as he could.

_Either whoever built these robots is the world's worst mechanic, or my tails are crazy-strong._

He sliced through another robot, pirouetting like a ballerina, not bothering with the flip. His tails instinctively spread out sideways, and sliced three deep gashes into the robot. Its power supply was damaged, and it exploded-

But not before Jack saw what was going to happen, and threw the robot into a nearby cluster of enemies. They also exploded, and the chain reaction must have destroyed about twenty-seven robots. He counted them with a grin, wondering how many Naomi had destroyed. Perhaps this day wouldn't be so bad after all...

The sky began to change colour, from a solid black tainted with smoke and ashes blotting out the stars, to a cover of blood-red clouds. A hole opened up in the middle of the clouds, and creatures started falling out of it. They appeared humanoid, about the same size as them, and they were red and black, with pupil-less yellow reptilian eyes. Others looked similar, but thye were seven feet tall with ripped muscles, with scaled spikes sticking out of their backs and shoulders. There were a few flying creatures that looked like some sort of red-and-black bat... hawk... thing. Together, they began laying waste to the village and crushing every robot they saw, and killing anything that wasn't them if it got in the way.

Team Wings took it upon themselves to target the flying creatures. Or at least, Jess and Abigail did. Carl kept attacking the aliens on the ground, laughing about how easy it was, and loudly shouting out disparaging remarks about the aliens and their parentage.

Naomi saw a small puppy, a corgi, running around wildly, with panic and absolute fear in his eyes. He couldn't have been older than six. A nearby alien saw the easy target, brought its sword down on the poor dog's head, and-

Naomi looked away. When she looked back, she saw the alien covered in blood, and the puppy on the floor, its head split in half right down to the neck.

She screamed with rage, and sliced through aliens left, right and center, not bothering with examining things, or tactics. Those vicious, murdering creatures just killed a cute, adorable, unarmed, defenceless puppy, and she was going to destroy, no, _kill_ every last one of them, or she would die trying.

She felt angrier than she ever had before, and thought that perhaps her animal instincts were helping with this. Not that she cared, she just wanted more destruction. She ran towards that blood-stained alien on all fours, slashing though anything that got in her way.

She quickly reached her target, and clawed its reptilian chest open, and was pleased to find that she could claw through its skin and cartilaginous skeleton even easier than it was to tear through metal. She tore it apart and kept maiming it even after it was dead, and was quickly covered in its green blood.

Jack had not seen the dog's death, and guessed that Naomi just really hated alien invasions. "Hey, Sis, that thing is already dead. Go kill those things over there!"

Naomi seemed angered that her slaughter was interrupted, but got over it when she saw all of those identical creatures, begging her to destroy them. They were setting fire to trees and buildings, mindlessly destroying everything they saw. She ran forward at a disturbing speed, her claws dripping with blood, murderous intent in her eyes.

Meanwhile, Gary used pieces of leftover scrap metal and debris on the floor to shield himself from the gunshots while smashing up robots with his spanner. The monkey soon noticed that they weren't actual guns; they were some kind of laser, possibly powered by the machine's internal batteries. He promised himself that if there was at least one robot left in a decent shape by the time this was over, he would dismantle it and learn how it works, as there didn't seem to be any sort of wire of plug attaching the robot to its laser. The aliens had weapons that fired large, slow pulses of energy that looked like large purple hoops. He disregarded them, as he didn't trust alien technology, or any other technology he didn't understand.

Whenever Gary stole a laser from one of the robots, he only had about 20 shots, before the battery ran out and the laser became useless for anything besides scrap metal. He made sure to use the shots to shoot more robots, so he could take the batteries from the other lasers, and the cycle could continue. He wasn't sure where to shoot, so he aimed for the body of the robots, which, thanks to their absurd design, was easy.

He was born left-handed, but worked hard to become ambidextrous. He held his laser in his left hand, while his spanner was still in his right hand, which he used to destroy any robots that got within melee range, and block laser shots when he realised his spanner could deflect lasers somehow. Perhaps the lasers had very specific setting, and could cut through flesh, bone, and whatever the robots were made of, but they couldn't cut through whatever his spanner was made from.

Jack kept slicing through robots with his tails, alternating between left spins, right spins, front flips and backflips so he wouldn't get too dizzy. With every sideways spin, he saw the camp, or what was left of it.

Most of the huts had been completely burned down, their acrid smoke spewing into the air. The entire place was in ruins, and there were robots everywhere, circling around to attack them from behind. Rin and Frank were doing pretty well, but there were a few animal corpses on the floor showing they couldn't protect them all. Lolcat was on his knees trying to stop some of the recently-shot people from bleeding, but judging from his expression, he didn't seem to be doing too well. The situation seemed increasingly hopeless, and Jack decided to check something.

He ran up to a robot that was armed with a sharp-looking metal stick that could probably pass for a spear. He jumped, spin-kicked the spear out of its hands, landed on the robot, and then jumped again. He grabbed onto a nearby alien bat/hawk-thing, and was surprised when it managed to keep flying even with him holding onto it.

There were countless robots surrounding their camp, and from that height, it looked like a neverending army of ants attacking their home. For as far as he could see, there were nothing but robots, and more robots. More aliens were falling out of the hole in the clouds, obliterating the robots quite nicely. Their commander, if either army had one, was nowhere to be seen, so these machines were probably running on autopilot, and the aliens already had their orders. Obviously, these robots were sent here because their creator predicted that the aliens would land here first. Unfortunately, the robots didn't have much in the way of AI, and were mindlessly killing every organic creature they saw. If they did nothing, and waited for the two armies to kill each other, they would be dead before the armies had destroyed each other. Their best bet would be to run, and hope that the armies hated each other more than they hated them. Alternatively, he could use an EMP, hope that the aliens hated the robots more than they hated them, and run for their lives while the aliens smashed up the remaining useless blocks of scrap metal.

He landed after smashing the bat in half with his tails, and then crashed into an alien while spinning. The alien's weak skeleton and squishy internal organs managed to break his fall quite nicely, even if it did get destroyed in the process.

"Hey, Gary!" Jack yelled.

"What?!"

"Do you have an E.M.P. anywhere around here?!"

"NO! Why on earth would I have one?! Do you think I could have predicted THIS?!"

"Okay, nevermind!" Jack decided that his only other option had just been thrown out the window, so there was only one thing left to do.

"Retreat!" He screamed, running back to the circle of children protected by Rin and Frank. He noticed the group had thinned out, and there were only about 22 kids left alive, compared to the 37 there was this morning.

"Frank, Rin, I've seen it, for miles, robots everywhere! We can't possibly win!"

Rin looked disgusted at that. "I hate when people say that!" She yelled, smashing up a nearby robot with her claws. "Who cares if it's unreasonable, I say we kick reason to the curb, and go beyond the impossible, because that's just how I roll!"

"No. He's right, Rin." Frank said sullenly. "We are completely, without a doubt, screwed. There's only one thing left to do. Rin, order everyone to this spot."

Rin inhaled deeply, and roared out "EVERYONE, GET BACK HERE! DEFEND THE CHILDREN!"

Team Wings and Gary quickly showed up. Carl looked upset that somebody had ruined his fun, but Jess and Abigail seemed completely exhausted, and ready to give up. Gary looked around, and said nervously, "Where's Naomi?"

"Team Wings, go get Naomi back here. I know here, she'll never give up. Bring her back, but don't you dare hurt her, or I swear, I will eat you." Jack looked deadly serious, and his sharp teeth and metal-destroying tails whipping about made him look all the more dangerous, and completely capable of carrying out his threat.

The three flew off, and quickly spotted Naomi. She was on the other side of the village, tearing apart everything she saw. A few laser shots hit her, but she didn't really care. She wanted revenge, and as far as she was concerned, she was going to get it.

Team Wings flew at her, and tried to restrain her. She quickly knocked them away; got out of every hold they tried to put her in, and even slashed at them a few times.

"I've HAD it with this chick!" Carl yelled, and flew up, then dived at her. He hit her with a vicious flying kick to the side of her head, and she went out cold. He grabbed her, flew up, and held her up like some sort of prize.

"Hey, you know what I love about unconscious chicks?" Carl yelled. "They can't say-"

"CARL!" Jess screeched. "That girl is Jack's sister. You've seen what he can do!"

"Yeah, but he ain't so tough. I bet I could kick his too-many-tailed butt blindfolded."

"We are under attack, most of the people here are dead, the camp is destroyed, and you're being a complete and total poser!"

"Heh, like I give a-"

"GO!" Jess screeched, and chased him back to the center of camp.

_Heh,_ Abigail thought to herself, following behind them, _hen-pecked husband._

"So, is everybody here?" Frank asked, once Team Wings had returned with Naomi. They were completely surrounded on all sides, waiting for the group to make a move.

"Looks like it." Rin said with a cautiously hopeful smile.

Frank sighed, and seemed well and truly defeated. "So. It looks like there's only one thing left to do."

Jack could tell what was coming next, and cut in. "No, surrendering won't work. This alien army doesn't have a leader or commanding officer, all of these machines are working on autopilot, and they won't stop until we're all dead, the other side is all dead, and this place has been burned to the ground."

Frank sighed again. "What about an EMP?"

"No, for some reason, Gary forgot to build one."

"Some reason? Some reason?! FORGOT?!" Gary shouted. "Do you honestly think I could have predicted a ROBOT INVASION, that would happen AT THE SAME TIME as an ALIEN INVASION?!"

"Well," Frank said hopefully, "Could you build one now?"

"Sure," Gary deadpanned, "Just give me four months of uninterrupted building time without any distractions, specialised equipment, and all of the specific components I need."

"So you wouldn't be able to whip something up now, if we got you to your hut, then?"

"No. Also, that place has been burned down, and the metal has started to melt together. This whole village is entirely worthless. I see Rin's improvised fire-swords have broken, too. We're doomed."

"Hey Gary," Rin asked, noticing that Sam was still alive. "What about your pet kid, Sam? Could he-"

"Don't bother." Jack interrupted before Gary or Sam could respond. "These robots are cheaply-built, with barely-average cameras for eyes, and really stupid AI. No combat programming, beyond "Hit stuff with your weapon" and "Shoot stuff with your weak laser". Obviously, these things were built to be cheap, and mass-produced, possibly by a factory, or production line full of imbeciles. I doubt whoever built these would have wasted time and money on giving them a sense of smell. As for the other side, none of those creatures seem to have noses, so I doubt you'd have much luck there, either."

"Well then, there's only one thing left to do." Frank looked around one last time, and saw death and destruction all around him. The robots and aliens had started burning the bodies to make sure they could never get up again, and that, combined with the fires from the burning huts, made this place look like a classic depiction of the fire-and-burning-corpses Hell. Appropriate, considering what this next move was risking.

He grabbed two small kids by the scruff of their necks, and whispered, "Kids, grab onto everyone else, and hold on if you want to live. Seniors, grab as many kids as you can carry, and get ready to run like hell when you see the signal. The same goes for you, Team Wings. The forest is too thick to fly through, so you'll have to fly above the treeline."

"What signal?" Rin asked, getting nervous.

"I see that he's doing." Jack said, anticipating his moves again. "He's going to sacrifice himself, so we can escape. Well, if we're going to do this, we're going to do this right. Run towards 7 O'clock, the forest is thickest there. The robots with lasers won't be able to get a good enough aim to shoot you, plus these things don't look like they'd be agile enough to get through a forest full of trees at top speed."

Frank chuckled darkly, grabbing three more kids. He ended up with them all on his shoulders or back. Thankfully, they were all very light, and didn't weigh anywhere near as much as a human kid might. "Who said anything about sacrifices?"

"**NOW!"** He yelled, as he barrelled forwards, running towards the thickest part of the forest. His claws might not have been anywhere near as sharp as Rin's or Naomi's, but he was strong enough to bring them down with such force that they cut anyway. When his claws didn't cut the robots, they were crushed instead.

None of the kids went anywhere near Gary, besides Sam, so he decided to help fight off as many robots as he could, carving a path towards the forest. He had put his spanner back in his belt, along with about 380 shots worth of batteries, and was shooting up robots with his stolen laser held in his right hand, while Sam, the only kid Gary seemed to care about, was clinging onto his left arm for dear life.

Most of the kids decided to go with Rin, and she ended up with around seven kids on her. She didn't bother fighting, as trying to attack would probably end up with her either flinging a kid off, or worse still, she'd hit a robot with a kid. She just ran. Frank had his hands full carrying Naomi, who certainly weighed more than she used to. He was carrying her in both hands bridal-style, with his tails lashing out at any aliens or machines that got past the other two fighters.

Not all of the kids were being carried; a few of the faster ones that were still alive were running on-foot.

They got into a thick patch of the forest and kept running, dodging between trees every few steps. The group was running surprisingly fast, and Jack wondered if this was a side effect of becoming an animal. The way he was jumping through gaps in the trees, and the way he was carrying Naomi, it reminded him of that awful game that came out in 2006.

_It had a terrible plot and worse gameplay, and the fanbase, which was highly conflicted at the best of times, unanimously agreed that it was the absolute low point of the franchise, and the worst game in the entire series. What game was it? Sonic the H-_

_Oh crap. That means-_

_And I'm-_

_And this is-_

_And she's-_

_Oh crap._

He decided to tell everyone else about what he had figured out much later. They'd only just been fighting for their lives against an army of mostly-fictional robots and aliens; they didn't need to hear something like _that_ right now.

They kept running through the forest, and their leader was right, most of the robots hadn't been able to follow. A few had managed to get through the forest, but none of them were coming anywhere near them. Suddenly, it made perfect sense for everyone to be able to run at insane speeds, as most of the characters in that series were unreasonably fast. Even E-123 Omega, the robot from Team Dark who's weight was two-thirds ammunition, according to the comics, could keep up with Shadow and Rouge most of the time. Considering Shadow and Sonic were supposed to be as fast as each other, that was certainly impressive.

Jack pushed himself to run faster, and he sped up almost effortlessly. Dodging between trees at this speed was no problem for him; he had finished the hoverbike level of Battletoads in his first attempt with no guide, when he was younger. Still, this was his first time actually running at this speed, and crashing into a tree here would mean several broken bones, possibly even death, so he kept his speed at a solid 50 MPH, rather than the 75 MPH his instincts told him he could do.

Soon, the smell of smoke and the sound of metal on metal faded away, and Jack looked back to see if any robots or aliens had caught up with them. None had, but their village was now in absolute ruins. The fires were starting to spread to the trees, and soon, the entire forest would be obliterated.

"Alright," he announced, "Who's not dead?"

Rin fell over, completely exhausted, and the kids quickly jumped off her. Gary let his only kid down gently, reloaded a new battery into his laser, and put it into an empty pocket of his toolbelt.

Team Wings landed together, several kids clinging to each of them. Each one had wide eyes from panic and fear, their fur was blown all over the place, and they looked like they were on the verge of tears.

"Without the trees for cover," Jess explained as she shook off a Racoon that clung to her leg for dear life, "Several robots were able to shoot at us. We had to do some... evasive manoeuvres, and I doubt our passengers enjoyed the ride." The Racoon stumbled to his feet, and then vomited into a nearby bush. Hearing, seeing, and smelling that, many other kids who flew with Team Wings joined in.

"We're alive, so are they, it'll do." Gary said, with customary bluntness. "We survived; I count that as a victory, but, whatever. Who's hungry?"

"Wait. Where's Frank?" Jack asked.

Frank ran out of the forest, panting heavily, with a few kids still on him. Several patches of fur were singed off from laser fire, a few shards of scrap metal pierced his skin, and he looked ready to pass out from exhaustion.

Jack remembered that in the Sonic games, Power characters tended to be the slowest of the lot. Even with Frank getting that head start, he must have been pretty slow for him to have been last to get out.

Naomi murmured something in her sleep, and stirred. Jack slowly lowered her to the ground, and watched as she slowly woke up.

"Jack... I had this horrible dream... everything was wrong... we were animals... robots and aliens killed us all... a girl actually thought you were hot..."

Then she noticed Jack's vulpine face, and yelled "Oh, COME ON!"

"Yep, it's real." Jack said with a foxy grin.

"So Shadow the Hedgehog, Iron Man and Kamina really did join my Pokemon Rescue team, kick Fire Lord Ozai's butt, and together we brought peace and prosperity to Equestria?"

"No, that part really was a dream." Jack said as his smile faltered.

"I liked her better when she was asleep." Gary groaned.

A quick leg-sweep was all it took for her to bring him crashing down to the floor.

_Yep, she's back._ Jack thought with a smirk.

"Did we all die?" She asked nervously.

"Pretty much!" Carl yelled. "We only saved about three or four kids each, except for the Monkey over there, he just saved the one. And Fox-boy, his hands were full with you. I hope you don't feel bad for being stoopid, and fighting when you should have grabbed and run. Actually, yeah, feel bad. Because of you, four, five, maybe seven or eight kids have just died. You could have carried some, he could have carried some, but no, you wanted your precious little revenge. So, ya happy now, kid-killer?!"

Abigail looked to the heavens and played silently for the strength not to join in.

Naomi had no such reservations, and punched him in the gut so hard that he collapsed to the ground, gasping for breath.

"Is that what you do when you don't get your way?" Jess asked sarcastically. "You punch people, and hope that everything turns out okay? I agree, Carl is a jerk, and he wouldn't know a tactical maneuverer if it poked him in the eye, but he was right." All traces of sarcasm were gone at this point. "You shouldn't have been so dead-set on eliminating both armies. I don't know who you were, back home, but we don't have anything here. We don't have surgery, or sterile equipment, or anything needed to save your life if you got shot or stabbed! The best thing we've got is Lolcat, and the bandages he made out of leaves! If Carl hadn't knocked you out, you would have carried on fighting, and gotten overwhelmed and overrun by those... things. You really, really need to work on your anger issues, because, listen. It's one thing to hit Carl when he deserves it, but this?! This was all your fault! By the way, most girls would just go with a slap. You know, the normal ones!"

Her claws extended. "Are you saying I'm not normal?!"

"IGIARI!" Rin roared. "Rin was just trying her best to fight, it's not her fault that your idiot bird decided to hit her! What kind of guy hits a lady, anyway?!"

"What kind of lady hits a guy?" Jess responded, threateningly flaring her wings.

"The stupid, self-righteous kind." Gary said, checking his spanner for damage. "The kind you see in every anime ever, where a nice guy loves a brutal, unlikeable thug, who beats the life out of him every time she thinks he does something bad. However, because she's a woman, the audience is supposed to love her, because it's girl power, or some crap like that. There is such a huge domestic violence double-standard... Whatever, doesn't matter. If I ever get a girl, it'll be one of those nervous, submissive ones that'll do anything, or someone who's as good with technology as I am. That way, we can do stuff like fix a car together, and then when we're done, we'll lick the engine grease off-"

Gary stopped suddenly when he realised that everyone was staring at him.

"Anyway, swiftly moving on!" Jack yelled, trying to change the subject. "We are both figuratively, and literally, out of the woods, and I believe that without us to fight, those armies will destroy each other, like they were supposed to. After all, that is what the robots were designed and built to do."

"How can you tell?" Abagail asked, still looking up. "I thought you said you weren't good with machines?"

"No, I said Gary was better at building them than I was. I might not be able to build them, but I know designs, and I know what that design was for. Did anyone else look at those metal contraptions? I mean, really look at them?"

"Not really." Naomi admitted with a shrug. "After the alien killed that puppy, I kinda lost it. After that, I can't remember a thing. She chuckled nervously and scratched the back of her head, as if going limb-tearingly berserk was something to be mildly embarrassed about, like sneeze-farting in the middle of a yoga class. She had also done this once, back on earth, and had been the laughing stock of the school for all of two days, before her second-dumbest friend tried to sneak backstage in the middle of a rock concert to kiss her favourite pop star. She didn't make it, and she was literally thrown out on her butt by the security guards.

"Well, if you really looked at the devices, you'd see that they were designed to be cheaply built, and mass-produced by multiple factories." Jack said, deep in thought. "They are disposable, and it doesn't matter if the one controlling the machines loses a few hundred of them. They are pawns, mindless pawns to be sacrificed in place of getting the positional advantage. They weren't supposed to overpower the aliens, just outnumber then and overwhelm them with sheer numbers. If that didn't work, which it probably wouldn't, considering how powerful some of those enemies seemed to be, then they'd keep the aliens busy, until- EVERYBODY, RUN LIKE HELL!"

He took off, and even without the trees to slow him down, he held back anyway, reaching a speed of 60 MPH. Naomi effortlessly passed him at 65, and had started running the second she heard him give the order. She knew that whenever he panicked, it meant something seriously bad was going to happen. He rarely ever panicked. She didn't bother asking why they were running, she trusted that he'd predicted something terrible, probably a worst-case scenario that was about to come true. Everyone else followed quickly, trying their best to keep up.

"Team Wings, all three of you, grab Frank!"

Carl got up with his teammate's help, and the three of them picked up Frank, and carried him with them as they flew.

They made a mad dash through a relatively peaceful meadow, covered in grass and hills. A lot of the hills seemed unnaturally steep, as if they were designed for someone to run down. There were many flowers that might have looked pretty in the sunlight, but just looked creepy at night.

After they ran a few miles away from the camp, and scrambled up the largest hill for miles, they stopped. Team Wings unceremoniously dropped Frank on his head, and Carl laughed.

"Everyone, look at the base." Jack muttered when Frank had gotten up.

Everyone looked at where they guessed the base was. Many trees were now on fire, and the huge amount of smoke pouring into the sky wasn't halting the flow of falling aliens at all.

Suddenly, a column of bright white light pierced the red cloud and shot down into the center of the forest, and when it hit the ground, the energy built up, reflected, and spun into a white dome for a few seconds, then the massive amount of energy was released, obliterating the forest, and everything near it. All of the robots and aliens were completely destroyed or killed, and a large, deep, charred crater was the only sign that a forest had ever been there at all.

Jack was torn between pride, from predicting the enemy's moves so well, and horror, at seeing so much destructive power. It was one thing to select "Fire orbital satellite laser cannon" from an in-game menu and perhaps, depending on the game, watch a well-animated pre-rendered video showcasing the death it unleashed, but another thing entirely, to actually watch his home blown to oblivion by such a powerful force.

He grimly realised that the corpses of everyone who died there, had also been destroyed. They wouldn't even receive a proper burial, unless death by space laser counted as the space-age equivalent of a Viking fire funeral. Most of the kids started to cry, and several of them were clinging to each other for support, while the ones on their own, who had lost their friends, were the most upset.

_Well, now's as good a time as any._ Jack thought grimly.

"Our home..." Rin said quietly, as she fell to her knees. Naomi stroked her head softly, telling her that it would be alright. Everything would be okay. And maybe, if she kept saying it, she'd start to believe it as well.

"Jack." Gary said coldly. "How did you predict that?"

"It's obvious, isn't it?" Jack said loudly, making sure everyone could hear. "Fine then, Gary, I shall tell you how I could predict the destruction we just witnessed! Now, examine the facts we already know. Whoever built these robots knew that they couldn't overpower them through strength, even when they outnumbered the aliens so much. So, the mechanic made a large amount of disposable, unnecessary machines that pretty much equated to moving targets for the aliens to fire at, until the laser-satellite got into position. When the laser was in position, it fired, destroying both forces, and anything near it. If anyone else decided to get involved in the struggle, they would have been destroyed too."

"Wait, if those robots were supposed to fight the aliens, why did they attack us?" Frank asked, feeling the weight of failure fall upon him.

"Simple, really. They were designed to attack anything organic. You saw the green blood, the weak cartilage-ey skeleton, those aliens were organic. Putting in a more advanced scanner than can detect what something is, as well as whether it is organic or not, would be completely pointless. It would be an even bigger waste of resources."

Jack marched to the front of the group, standing between the group and their obliterated home. "Now think, who do we know that can build absurdly large armies of robots that are cheap to make, and easy to destroy? Who do we know that owns a working laser cannon, in space? Who do we know that would suspect that somebody else would get involved with the battle, and made sure that if he gets involved, he would also be destroyed? Who do we know that has a robotic army so large, that losing a few thousand pawns won't matter to him? Who do we know that fights organic enemies so often that he wouldn't even need to modify his robot army that much? Who do we know that fights someone who could get here fast enough to fight the aliens, possibly win, and then fight off the robots, possibly win again, and subsequently get destroyed by the laser?"

He gestured to where their home once was. "On the other hand, which alien species do we know of that look like that? They aimed for complete and total destruction, believing this to be some sort of city. In case you don't remember, they often use paralytic nerve gas when fighting, so a robot army would be the perfect thing to fight them. They killed everything they saw, us, robots, everything."

"In case it isn't obvious, I'll spell it out for you. DOCTOR IVO ROBOTNIK, A.K.A. EGGMAN, just fought against THE BLACK ARMS."

He continued, before anyone could respond. "Yes, you heard me correctly. Explains a lot, doesn't it? Like how we just ran so quickly, and for so far. I'm not sure if you noticed, but we just ran a few miles, at speeds most people would need cars to achieve! It explains why we are all animal-people-things, and yet the proportions are so wrong! It explains why time acts strangely, why the moon is always full, the alien invasion, everything!"

"How does-" Gary began, but was quickly cut off by Jack.

"If you remember correctly, a large chunk of the moon was destroyed in Sonic Adventure 2. It was a warning shot for the world, fired by Dr. Eggman, using the Eclipse Cannon, which I have no doubt he is currently aboard. He had six Chaos emeralds, and the Eclipse Cannon destroyed half of the moon. In Shadow the Hedgehog, the game, Shadow used the Cannon to destroy Black Doom's final form, after Chaos Controlling it into space. This time, I'm guessing he fired it with one or two Chaos Emerald, which explains why the laser was so weak. With all seven chaos emeralds, it can destroy the entire planet, remember?"

"As for the 'someone else' I was referring to, I obviously meant SONIC THE HEDGEHOG! Eggman guessed that he would show up, fight the Black Arms, probably bringing along a few of his many, many allies, and after wasting time fighting off all of the robots, and the Black Arms, he would also be destroyed by the laser. If Sonic is destroyed, then Eggman had destroyed his ultimate arch nemesis, and one of the few things binding the other main characters together. If Sonic escaped the range of the laser, which he probably would, then it wouldn't matter, as he'd still be destroying a significant portion of the Black Arms force."

"But why-"

"In case you haven't noticed, Eggman, in the game series, isn't actually evil. Many of the things he does may be morally questionable, like building robots to be piloted by mind-controlled animals, but he's never actually tried to destroy the world. He's held the entire planet hostage a few times, but never tried to actively destroy the planet. In Shadow the Hedgehog, the game, he claimed that he wouldn't be able to 'take over the city and build the Eggman Empire if there IS no city'. So, the two opposing armies would definitely fight."

"How can-" Gary asked to Naomi.

"When he gets excited, he predicts what people are saying, and interrupts them." Naomi explained. "So, Jack-"

"Yes, I appear to be the same creature as Tails." Jack interrupted.

"Wait, wasn't Tails just a hideously deformed fox?" Frank asked.

"HEY! Tails is cute!" A rather young female squirrel yelled out, then hid behind Rin when everyone turned to look at her.

"Perhaps, but no." Jack said, ignoring her comment. "In the comics, he's a regular fox, both his parents are normal, and he's just got an extra tail somehow. In the games, however, he is a Kitsune. He is called a Kitsune in the Japanese game manual, and in Sonic the Hedgehog 2, his first appearance, he cannot be killed. Even if he dies, he just flies back down. This allowed Naomi to finish the boss battles easily, the first time when we played the game. I have three tails, as I am older, so I am also a Kitsune. I am not sure if I am also immortal, as I personally believe that he only regenerated because adding in coding for a second character would take far too long, and the game would have to have been delayed. Back then, great games weren't delayed by a few years every time the executives in charge decided that they wanted to add a pointless new feature."

"Is-" Naomi began.

"Yes, that was a jab at the team who made Super Smash Bros Brawl, and how they delayed it so much, and how they could possibly thing that tripping and falling over was so important to a fighting/platform game, that the game had to be delayed over and over again to add it in."

"What-"

"Gary, I agree, that has absolutely nothing to do with the current topic. And that topic is, WHAT DID I DOWNLOAD, AND WHAT HAVE THE GOVERNMENT PUT ME ON?!"

"Jack, don't worry!" Naomi said quickly, realising where this was going. "You're fine, this is real."

"That's exactly what my subconscious would tell me!"

"No, your subconscious would piece together the whole thing instantly, and then slam the non-realism of this world into your face repeatedly until you forced yourself awake. You'd be in some stupid, badly-drawn kid's cartoon, like that one about the fry-cook sea sponge. Or, you'd be in something so painful that waking up would be the only thing your mind could do to stay alive, like a never-ending torture session or something. Like that one you wrote, in that brilliant Fire Emblem fic! Besides, I wouldn't be with you."

"Yes you would, you're a symbol of my humanity, and the one thing left connecting me to the outside world. If it wasn't for you, I'd be spending all my time inside, away from the world completely. You are the only human contact I have, most of the time. I don't know if I've ever told you this, but... You are the only human alive that I don't hate."

Naomi couldn't think of a response for that, so she hugged him, and hoped it was a compliment.

Gary ignored the hug, as it reminded him of what he had lost. Instead, he wordlessly passed his recently-repaired pocket computer to Jack.

Frank turned to the group, and loudly announced, "So, there you have it. Except for the end part about hallucinations, ignore that bit. I have never played a game in my life, and I didn't understand most of that. But anyway, we shall keep moving forward, because we can't go back, because our home has just been blown up. So," he said, as he punched the air with each shout, "KEEP! MOVING! FORWARD!"

He paused to hear the applause, but there was none. Instead, everyone glared at him, consumed with despair and hopelessness.

"Forward to where?!" Rin yelled, her eyes full of tears. "Where can we go?!"

"I can answer that." Frank said. "If this is all part of my mind, then it stands to reason that I shall escape this hallucination, recover my sanity, and wake up when I escape this planet, and get home. If this is actually happening, then we should try and get home anyway, before the apocalypse happens. There's some sort of apocalypse in every game, near the end, just before Sonic uses the emeralds to fight the Evil God of the week, right after it betrays Eggman. Now, the best way to travel between dimensions, as the games, fanfiction, and anime have repeatedly shown, is Chaos Control. You need chaos emeralds for that. One emerald might be enough to teleport one person, perhaps two in an emergency. Like the green emerald that Shadow always keeps with him."

Naomi's ears perked up at that. "Shadow?"

Jack went on, ignoring her. "However, travelling between separate dimensions usually takes more emeralds then that."

"But what about the time in Sonic Universe, when Shadow and Metal Sonic were fighting, and Chaos Controlled themselves into Blaze's dimension?"

"Was that a game?"

"No, it was a comic."

"THEN IT NEVER HAPPENED! This is the VIDEO GAME canon we're working with, people! Forget the comics, forget the TV shows, and pray to whatever god you serve that '06 won't happen here."

He clasped his hands together, and then stood where Frank was standing when he made his speech. He threw his arms wide, and smirked. "If we are going to get back home, we need those chaos emeralds. Eggman will want the chaos emeralds to do... whatever it is he does with them. My money's on 'Emerald-powered giant robot'. Sonic will want the emeralds to defeat Eggman. Shadow will want the emeralds to defeat the Black Arms, and the Black Arms will want the emeralds to chaos-control that meteor-thing into this planet, if they haven't done that already. I'm not sure where we are in the series, but judging from the moon, and the Black Arms invasion, I'd say we are somewhere between Heroes, and Shadow the Hedgehog, the game."

"Well then..." He said, and threw his arms wide. "Let's go get those emeralds!"

The crowd erupted into a loud cheer, and Jack felt certain that this was going to be a great week.


	4. All's well that ends well, indeed!

"Let's go get those emeralds!"

The crowd cheered loudly, applauded, then stopped when they realised they had no idea where to look.

"So... where do we look?" Gary asked.

If this was an anime, everyone would be falling on their faces. Except for Jack, who had already thought of an answer.

"As you know," Jack began, "Shadow always keeps one emerald with him at all times. Usually, it's the green one. Also, Knuckles the Echidna can sense chaos energies, hence his ability to find shards of the master emerald in Sonic adventure 1 and 2. Rouge the Bat, on the other hand, can sense nearby precious stones and treasure, which is why her ability worked on those keys in Sonic Adventure 2, in the level where she needed to find keys. Our best bet would be to find Shadow, Knuckles, or Rouge."

"I say we look for Shadow, or Rouge." Naomi offered. "Those two are in love, so where we find one, we'll find the other."

"Shadow and Rouge aren't in love!" A small Racoon yelled out. "Shadow is too cool for a relationship, like Sonic!"

"No, the only reason Sonic doesn't have a relationship is because Amy keeps stalking him." Naomi explained. "Amy isn't anywhere near fast enough to be dating Sonic; when he runs from her, he wants her to chase him down using pure speed and agility, not walking around and hunting him down using a combination of tarot cards, manipulating Big and Cream into helping her look, asking people where he is, tracking down Eggman to get herself kidnapped again, and just randomly walking from zone to zone and hoping for the best. Sonic could have a relationship with other girls if he wanted, but in his mind, nobody else is anywhere near cool enough. In a few scenes, you see him flirt with Shade, Blaze, and the other cool female characters in the series, but either they think Amy and Sonic are having a secret relationship, and she's terrible at keeping secrets, or Amy outright tells the women to go away, as she is already dating Sonic."

"Now now, you know what they say happens when people assume. You make an a-" Jack began, then changed his mind. "Anyway, let's not assume anything just yet. This is the game's canon, not the comic canon, and certainly not the "Fanon", as they call it. Unless two characters have been shown kissing on-screen, then it is not a canon relationship."

"Kissing on-screen, huh?" Rin asked. "You mean, like when Rouge kissed Tails?"

"That twenty-something thief kissed an eight-year old fox?" Jack said with undisguised disbelief. "What game did THAT happen in?"

"It happened in Sonic X."

"The TV show?"

"Yeah, it-"

"THEN IT DIDN'T HAPPEN IN THE GAMES!" Jack interrupted. "Come ON, people! Only things that happened in the games have actually happened here! Is it really that hard to keep your canons straight?"

"Speaking of things not being straight..." Carl yelled out, "I always thought that Sonic didn't have a girlfriend, because he and Tails, and maybe knuckles, were secretly-"

"Don't even go there." Naomi warned, as her claws extended.

"That would never be allowed in a game." Jack said loudly, trying to stop the argument, "And only things that have happened in the game have actually happened here. Now, the best place to find Rouge, would be at G.U.N. headquarters, wherever that may be, or at a Jewellery store somewhere in whatever major city she's in, depending on how far we are along the game series. The best place to find Shadow would be on a hill near Westopolis, where he'll be angsting it up, until Sonic or Doom's Eye finds him and has him join their side. As for Knuckles, well, we all know where he'll be. Angel Island, a flying island somewhere in the middle of nowhere. It could be anywhere on the planet. Unless it has permanently crashed near Station Square, in which case, let's go there. So, we all agree that the best move is to find the nearest major city and make our way from there?" He paused for the smallest possible fraction of a second, and then continued before anyone could object. "Perfect, so we all agree, we're going to find the nearest available city. Also, if we convince Shadow to help us, me might perform Chaos Control for us. Which is good, because I doubt anyone here could pull that off. Sonic learned how to do it, after seeing it done a few times. But, I doubt he has the skill needed to teleport a large group of people that far. Shadow, on the other hand, is actually 40, even though he's physically 18, and will be for all eternity. Ultimate Life Form, remember? Anyway, he's been practicing Chaos Control for years, so we'll definitely be having him teleport us, if we have the choice."

"I volunteer to convince Shadow!" Naomi shouted out.

"I knew you would. I can always count on you." He said softly, then announced "Now, if we can't find Shadow or Rouge, then we should try and find Tails. He's been to Angel Island enough times to know where it is, or to figure out where it will be. Same goes for Sonic, if we find him. So, did Lolcat survive?"

"Ja!"

"Great. Patch up everyone who survived."

There was a long 5 minutes, while Lolcat closely examined everyone, and bandaged everyone who needed it. However, nobody actually needed it. Not many people were actually hit by the lasers or weapons, except for Frank, who had far too many laser burns to be considered healthy. Still, the lasers didn't cut him, they just singed off his fur. To cover them up, Lolcat put some bandages around him anyway, so that if anyone asked, he could always claim he'd been in a fight, and he'd won. He could then imply that the person that he was fighting had ended up much worse off.

Jack smiled. Everyone who's name he knew was alive, and that was all that counted. Everyone else, whose names he didn't know, they were just a bonus. "Perfect, we haven't lost too many people." He said with a grin. "Now then, let's go get those emeralds!"

The crowd cheered, and immediately set off in what they guessed was the right way. They started off walking, but after they remembered where they were and what their new, physics-defying animal bodies could do, started running at speeds that would make every theoretical physicist for miles weep.

Jack ran as fast as he could, hitting his 75 MPH limit quite quickly. He felt as if he'd reached terminal velocity, or what he guessed terminal velocity felt like. He tried running faster, but found that no matter how quickly he moved his feet, his body wouldn't move any faster than 75. He wondered how it must feel for the people living here, to have a solid, unbreakable limit on their speed that can never be surpassed no matter how hard you try.

Naomi slowly moved past him, effortlessly doing 90 MPH. He briefly wondered if his multiple tails were slowing him down, as they were currently waving about behind him like three scarves, not doing much. He experimentally spun his tails, and found that he instinctually knew how to spin his tails in a way that made sure that neither of the tails collided, and they all spun as much as they could. He tried spinning them faster, and he eventually managed to speed up to 100 MPH, catch up to Naomi, and surpass her with a grin.

Further back, Rin was grinning at Gary, who was stuck at 70, while she was pulling ahead at 75 every few seconds, laughing at him.

Slightly further back, most of the kids were going around 60, with the slower and fatter kids at the back, who were almost as slow as Frank, stuck at an unbearable 50. Normally, running at 50 MPH would be considered a dream come true, but when stuck behind a bunch of 7-12 year olds who were somehow faster than he, a 23-year old man, could ever hope to be, it was incredibly annoying.

The group kept running in silence, surprised at how they weren't even winded after running at such speeds for so long.

"Hey, Naomi." Jack said, and was surprised at how he could even _breathe_ at this speed, let alone talk to someone going just as fast as he was.

"Yeah?" She asked, and seemed to think a similar thing.

"I'm going ahead, I'll be back if there's anything there."

"What do you mean? I thought this was your top speed?"

"With these tails? Not even close!" Jack yelled out, and started spinning his tails even faster. He took off like a bullet, and she soon lost sight of him.

Jack was soon spinning his tails at speeds almost equal to Tails the Fox, his greater number of tails made up for his lack of practice, and was soon zooming along at what his instincts told him was two hundred and seventy miles per hour.

His legs started to ache, and then he tripped on a rock. However, his tails automatically adjusted, and he started skimming along the surface of the ground at an insane three hundred and twenty five miles per hour, with his feet hardly touching the ground at all. His mind went blank and his vision darkened, and the roar of the wind around his head drowned out all available noise. He felt as if he was about to pass out, and he had no doubt that taking a tumble at this speed would be fatal.

He slowed down his tails, and started running again when he got to 110 MPH. He kept slowing down, until he got back to 75 MPH. At that point, he decided that he'd never go anywhere near that speed, ever again.

He looked around, and didn't see anything of note, so he stopped to take a rest. He turned on his repaired pocket computer, and when he opened up the apps menu, he noticed a new app, "Nearby Signals".

He activated the app, and a large blue arrow showed up on the screen, pointing to the left. He shrugged, and followed the arrow. The arrow moved around like a compass, and he guessed that it pointed towards the nearest available internet connection that the computer could use.

Where there would be a city, there had to be at least one web-café or wifi hotspot, so he waited for everyone to get close enough to see him change direction, then started running in the direction the arrow pointed to.

The rest of the group were confused by his sudden change in direction, but they wordlessly followed him, guessing that he must have known what he was doing.

After a few minutes of running at high speed, they eventually found the source of the signal, in a place nobody expected to have one.

A once-prosperous city, destroyed by floods. Skyscrapers were diagonally slashed apart, and broken overhead highways served as bridges that stood above the one-storey-high water. Fallen rubble and debris floated in the ocean, and the whole place was deathly quiet, with not a single person alive to make any sound.

Station Square, or what was left of it.

"What... what happened?" Rin asked quietly.

Jack inhaled deeply, and answered. "In the final story of Sonic Adventure, Perfect Chaos flooded the city, and destroyed everything. Sonic might have beaten Chaos, but the damage was still done."

Everyone felt a hopeless feeling of despair and misery emanating from the ruined buildings. They wondered how many lives must have been lost when the tidal wave hit and the buildings were obliterated.

Jack chuckled ruefully. "'All's well that ends well' indeed."

"Well," Jack said coldly, turning around and hiding his sadness well thanks to his years of practice, "This must be where the signal was coming from. Perhaps there is a web-café here somewhere, or a wifi point nearby. Perhaps not all of the houses were completely destroyed. Anyway... We should leave."

Suddenly, a voice called out to them.

"Hey! Are you lost?"

The group turned around, and saw that the voice came from someone they certainly weren't expecting to see here, someone that nobody recognised at first.

She looked like some kind of cat, but she was bright yellow, and wore a red and black dress with white laces. She had a red hairband around her black hair, and gloves designed differently to most Sonic characters. Her red high-heeled boots looked quite impractical for running, but since most Sonic characters were quite short anyway, it was acceptable. She had two large angelic wings on her back, which was surprising, since nobody seemed to know of any cats back home that had wings.

"Yeah," Jack said first, as Naomi silenced everyone else in the group with a glare. She trusted him to know what he was doing, and when it came to explaining weird things in a believable way, he was the master of deception.

"We were looking for Station Square." Jack continued. "Is... is this it?"

The catgirl looked abysmally depressed, and Jack couldn't help finding it adorable. "Yeah. Most of the survivors moved to Central City, the capital, and New Station Square is starting up in the Ice Cap Zone, but... not everyone made it."

"Where's that?" Jack asked.

She looked at him oddly.

"We're travellers, from somewhere really, really far away from here." He explained, rubbing the back of his head, embarrassed.

She seemed to be in a better mood. "It's this huge city in the middle of the continent. It's near Eggmanland, and what's left of Prison Island."

He smiled. "Thanks. My name's Jack, what's your name?"

"Jack what?" She asked, looking at him oddly.

He was about to say Jack Jackson, his full name that he hated using. It was a name that had been the target of ridicule for as long as he could remember, and he sometimes wondered if his family named him based on a dare, a bet, or some twisted sense of humour. Then he remembered where he was, and what she was most likely referring to.

"Jack the Fox." He said proudly, as he realised he could finally do away with that absurd last name forever.

"Honey the Cat." She said with the sweetest smile he'd ever seen on a girl. He wondered if this was a cat thing, a catgirl thing, or if it was just part of who she was. "By the way... Are you, by any chance, related to Tails?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, you're both foxes, with similar..." She trailed off while looking at his tails, hoping he'd get what she was trying to say.

He did. "No, we aren't related. By the way, how do you and Tails know each other?"

"Well, a while back, I joined this mixed martial arts tournament, to promote my clothing line. I never actually got in, since they had too many entrants, and didn't have time to do a preliminary round. Anyway, I stood just behind him in the queue, when we were signing up for the tournament. He looked young, I mean, _really_ young, so we made small talk. You know, television, movies, books, Eggman's latest failed scheme, that sort of thing."

Jack pieced this information together, and finally recognised her. This was Honey the Cat, a scrapped character from Sonic the Fighters. She was only playable when you used hacks, and Jack was more than skilled enough to unlock and play a half-made character.

_An unused character showing up? Great._ Jack thought to himself. _We're going to be in one of __**those**__ fangames._

"Yeah, I've seen your clothes, they look great!" Jack said out loud with a nice, closed-mouth smile. He thought that his teeth were far too sharp and dangerous-looking to ever be used in a real, genuine smile. Even if the smile wasn't genuine at all, which it wasn't. If Fanon was correct, Honey the Cat was seriously rich, so he decided he should try and befriend her.

"Thanks!" She said with a similarly sweet smile, sure that even with his new Kitsune body, he was still as charming as ever. "By the way, there's something I've always wanted to ask you." He said, remembering something the fanbase had been debating about ever since her data was discovered. "Those wings on your back, are they part of the clothes, or are they yours?"

"They're mine!" She said proudly, flexing them a few times. "They might not be strong enough for proper flight, but I can glide with them for... as long as I want, really. So, you like what you see, fox-boy?" She asked as she posed.

Naomi rolled her eyes. Why did _every_ single girl here fall for him? It must be the tails, there was no way he was ever this popular back home. Why else would he be alone all the time? There was no way he turned down every date offer he ever got, just so he could play video games. That was just lame; no guy she knew, no matter how nerdy, would ever choose gaming over love.

"Alright, that's enough." Naomi said, standing between her brother, and this Cat she didn't recognise.

"Hey, wait your turn!" She pouted, and then had an idea. "Wait, are you two dating?"

Naomi almost choked, Jack suddenly got very interested in his handheld computer, and Gary fell on the floor as he laughed more than he had in weeks, maybe even months.

"No way!" Naomi yelled.

"Allow me to explain..." Gary said, recovering from his laughing fit. He looked serious for a moment, and then said "It's true; these two are deeply in love."

He fell on the floor in a giggling fit, and a few kids joined in.

"No," Jack explained after sighing, "We are not dating. She's my sister."

"Wait," Honey said, not understanding it at all. "you're a fox, and she's... something else."

"Panther. Naomi the Panther." She said through sharp gritted teeth as she debated with herself as to whether she should hit Gary first, or Honey, or pick up Gary and throw him at Honey.

"Their parents had what some might call an... _active_ social life!" Gary explained for them. He had intended it as a joke, he didn't expect that he might be right. "Luckily, they ended up normal, and didn't get wings, or tentacles, or anything."

"And what's wrong with wings?" Honey asked, putting her hands on her hips and threateningly flexing her wings.

Jack moved in suddenly, and stroked the side of Honey's face with his hand. "Nothing, absolutely nothing." He said, turning his charm up to 11 in the hopes of stopping a fight before it started.

She backed away, grinning and blushing wildly, and grinning even more when she spotted a lioness glaring pure, distilled death at her.

"So, if this town was destroyed, what are you doing here?" Rin asked with a bit more venom than necessary.

"I was here to see the damage for myself. I remembered hearing something about a tidal wave on TV, but then again, a town gets destroyed every week, and it gets rebuilt just as quickly." Honey said nonchalantly. "Still, I had a few shops in Station Square, so I thought I should pay it a visit anyway. By the way, who are you?"

"Rin the Lioness." She muttered, and she glared so hard at Honey that she almost spontaneously combusted.

"Anyway." Frank spoke up. "Could you let us borrow a map, so we can get to Central City?"

"Better yet, I could take you there, if you want." Honey said, smiling mischievously. "I can even drive you there. As long as _he_ sits next to me."

Jack noticed she was pointing at him, spent a few milliseconds thinking, and smiled. "My mother always warned me about getting into cars with beautiful young ladies."

"This isn't a car." She said, moving closer to him.

"Your logic is as flawless as your fur. Deal!"

Honey got something out of a pocket on the inside of her dress, pressed a button, and grinned.

When Honey the Cat said she wanted to sit next to Jack, everyone was expecting a limo to spontaneously materialise out of thin air. Instead, after a few moments of waiting, a large truck drove up that looked a lot like the G.U.N. truck from Sonic Adventure 2, only it was emblazoned with Honey's completely illegible company name. The back door opened automatically with a pneumatic hiss. Jack and Honey got into the two passenger seats at the front, while everyone else had to get in the back, and travel with the truck's cargo of clothes. They were reluctant at first, but when Honey said that everyone who rode in the back could wear anything they liked, and keep it, they all agreed.

The interior of the truck was a dull grey, offset by the row after row of vibrant clothes, neatly arranged and divided into sections, based on type, size, and intended species.

This world had no rules about full or partial nudity, so clothing was usually used either for decoration, or for something functional, like something with a lot of pockets. Most animal-people wore shoes and gloves, as the absurd speeds most people were capable of doing would be pretty painful for somebody to try with nothing on their feet. When the "Travellers" got here, one of the most important things they needed was shoes. Gloves were popular for some reason, Naomi's best guess was that they covered the claws of most predators, making them seem more friendly and cartoony, and less like dangerous killers that could tear out a person's throat with their bare hands.

Looking at the many, many articles of clothing available, everyone quickly removed what was left of their duct-tape shoes, and grabbed whatever they liked.

Rin got a pair of black boots with blue heels, with the synthetic polymers going up to her upper thigh. She wasn't sure what they were made of, but they felt like a mix between spandex and plastic, only much stronger. They looked like Hatsune Miku's boots, so she couldn't say no. Naomi grabbed a pair of lightweight shiny black trainers, and a pair of fingerless gloves to allow her to still use her claws, and moved on to the dress section before anyone else did. Gary debated on whether he should get shoes, or keep his monkey hand-feet-things free and unrestrained. He eventually decided on a pair of nondescript blue sneakers, as they seemed to be completely indestructible. He promised himself that he would take them off if he needed to, and wouldn't keep them on anyway just to look good. He didn't care much for physical appearances, least of all his own. It took a while for Frank to find a pair of shoes that would fit him, and look good on him. He ended up with heavy steel-toe boots. There might not have been much point getting heavy footwear, since all the shoes here seemed to be indestructible, but he was a bricklayer back home, and he always liked the feeling of safety and partial invincibility those heavy shoes gave him.

After the older people had chosen their clothes, the children descended on the racks of clothing like an angry mob looting a store. Clothes were thrown around, people fought each other for the coolest-looking items, and nobody really cared enough to try and organise the chaos. Eventually, they all ended up with trainers and gloves that looked vaguely like the ones Sonic owned, and used whenever he wanted to grind on rails, but each one had some sort of minor difference that made them all different enough for Honey to maintain plausible deniability, if the creator of those shoes ever re-appeared from his/her retirement/mysterious disappearance and decided to sue.

Most were content with just boots and gloves, but Rin, a small squirrel girl named Louise, and a few other girls decided to check the dress section.

After going past a longcoat with an absurd amount of gun holsters, and something else that looked like steampunk jewellery gone wrong, the travellers spotted a kimono, with five built-in fully stocked katana holsters; four on the hips, and a larger one on the back. This went to Rin, who was prepared to die for such a garment. The same went for the grey headband, with two built-in butterfly knifes. They both felt normal enough, but on closer inspection, she realised they were also made of the same unbreakable material. She promised herself she would ask about that later.

Naomi went past the frilly dresses and strange-looking outfits, eyeing everything distastefully and wondering if there was anything she'd ever wear in a million years. The way things were, she wouldn't be surprised if she found a dress made of telephones, or a bikini made of meat. Then again, a meat bikini would just be begging the world to eat them. Still, she briefly wondered if Honey the Cat's clothing line was this reality's version of Lady Gaga, considering the insane outfits she'd seen so far.

She went past a dress made of bandages, and wondered how something like that could possibly be worn in a fight without unravelling. It seemed to be designed to fall apart, unless the user was the god of bandages or something, and could control them. Eventually, she found something she liked. A simple, nondescript black leotard made of the same indestructible synthetic material everything else was. She never liked fancy dresses much; back home, she'd prefer something simple, unpretentious and reliable. Preferably, it would also be quite sexy, but in a way that wasn't too obvious.

"Hey, how do I look?"

Rin and Naomi turned, to see Gary in a blue longcoat that looked like it was from some sort of military group.

"Not bad, Roy Mustang!" Rin joked.

"Who?" Gary asked, then realised who he was talking to. "Whatever, I really don't care. Anyway, do you have any idea how many pockets this thing has?! There are even more of them inside! I've got my spanner, separated into two pieces, my stolen lasers, a lot of batteries, and everything else I could ever need! This is, without a doubt, the coolest coat I've ever worn!"

"Woah, I never expected a guy to get this excited about clothes." Naomi taunted.

"I don't love all clothes, just this one. And not because it looks good, just because it is good, and it does what I need it to do." Gary explained.

"Hey, what's that sound?" Rin asked, putting her ear up to one of the speakers on the PA system. She wasn't sure why this truck had a PA system, but guessed it was probably so that the driver could talk to the soldiers inside the truck. It was turned on, but it was so quiet that Rin had to focus just to tell what was going on in there. Still, if she heard right... Eeep.

In the front seat, things were so awkward that Jack wished he could spontaneously combust.

"So," Jack asked, looking out the window in a nonchalant, uninterested way that, he knew from experience, always drove the ladies crazy, "How are you?"

"Pretty good." Honey answered, staring at him.

The two were sitting together on the huge passenger seat, with Jack next to the door and window, and Honey sitting between him, and her driver. He was an overweight man in overalls, and was probably some sort of Rhino.

The vehicle gave a vicious jerk as the truck drove over a fallen log. The two bounced about in their seatbelts, but it was over soon for them. Jack could only wonder how everyone else was doing.

"Do we have a radio?" Jack wondered, looking at the car radio, willing to do anything to break the awkward silence.

"Yeah. Want to turn that on, too?"

Jack tried to ignore the comment and undid his seatbelt, leaned over her, and turned on the radio. She rested her head against his shoulders, and grinned wildly. He fiddled with the dial, unsure of how this dimension's radio works, or where the good radio stations were, so he started at 800 and went up from there, hoping he'd find something he liked. Several songs, advertisements, and fragments of talk-shows were played between bursts of static, and Jack was soon realising why the radio was losing more and more people to the internet every day back home.

_It seems it's just out of siiight! The ones with answers always get their-_

_A new venture arrives, arrives-_

_Iiii'm too speedy for my shirt, too speedy for-_

_I'm running wild, living faaaaaast and free! Got no regrets inside-_

_Studies show that 75% of all middle aged men are having trouble keeping their spines erect. For fast, reliable help, use-_

_I'm falling free, in the wind, in the wind! Free to be me, in the-_

_Night Babylon, where it's party time, all the time! Call-_

_So tell me, you poor, sweet, 11-year old kitten, how exactly did this fourty-something squid steal your-_

_BUUURNIIING IIIIIN MY SKIIIIN, THESE WOOOUUUNDS, THEY WILL-_

_Almost dead, almost dead, almost dead to the world! Almost-_

Eventually, they found a song that was just starting.

"I love this one!" Honey squealed with delight, right into his ears.

Jack backed away quickly, and after his ears recovered, he noticed that he also knew this song. This was the Modern Sonic Remix of Escape from the City, one of his favourite Sonic songs of all time. He had sung the original version of this song once, when his primary school did a talent contest. He won, singing this song. Then again, the only other real competition he had was from Naomi and her friends, and their barely-passable attempt at a group song. Most of the other kids had either failed the auditions after killing the judge's faith in the future of the world just a little bit more, or watched the show. This was back when Jack was young, and victory still meant something to him. These days, victory was just something that came so easy that it barely registered.

"Rolling around at the speed of sound!" She began, and Jack quickly pushed his melancholy thoughts to the back of his head. The song had started, and he knew he had to be good, to keep her interested. The ladies loved a good singer, and if this Catgirl was sufficiently human, so would she.

"Got places to go, got to FOLLOW MY RAINBOW!

Can't stick around, have to keep moving on,

Guess what lies ahead, only one way to find out!"

"Must keep on moving ahead!" The two sung as they started singing together.

"No time for guessing, follow my plan instead!

Trusting in what you can't see,

Take my lead I'll set you free!"

"Follow me, set me free,

Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through.

Follow me!"

"Follow me, set me free,

Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through prove it to you.

Follow me!"

The singers were okay, but the driver seemed like he'd rather be anywhere else but here. Still, they were starting to get into the song more, and after Jack got over the surreal experience of riding around in a repurposed G.U.N. Truck, singing Sonic songs with an abandoned Sonic character, he started to sound pretty good, which Honey rewarded by sounding even better.

"Follow me!

Oh yeah!

Follow me!

Oh yeah!"

"Danger is lurking around every turn," The two sang, with Jack doing the low harmonies, and Honey singing the higher part.

"Trust your feelings, got to live and learn.

I know with some luck that I'll make it through,

Got no other options, only one thing to do!"

"I don't care what lies ahead," Honey sang.

"No time for guessing, follow my plan instead.

Find the next stage, no matter what that may be.

Take my lead, I'll set you free."

"Follow me, set me free" the two sang together,

"Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through.

Follow me"

"Follow me, set me free,

Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through prove it to you.

Follow me!"

"Surprises are hiding out in front of me!" Honey sang as she put her hand on the side of Jack's face.

"Uncover their secrets and then we will soon be free!" He answered, and the two held their gaze for the entirety of the guitar break.

"Follow me, set me free!" The two sang together.

"Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through.

Follow me!

Follow me, set me free,

Trust me and we will escape from the city.

I'll make it through prove it to you.

Follow me!

Follow me!

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Follow me!

Oh yeah!

I'll make it through, oh yeah!"

The truck bounced as it rolled over a fallen log, and she fell on top of him.

"Get a room." The truck driver muttered, ruining the mood. Jack and Honey sat back down in their seats, and wordlessly redid their seatbelts. The truck driver jabbed the OFF button on the radio with a large thumb, and went back to focusing on the road, as the awkward silence returned.

The truck jumped suddenly, and everyone fell to the ground.

"What was THAT?!" Naomi yelled, pulling herself up using a nearby clothes rack.

Rin, who had instinctively gone on all fours, grimaced and pointed to the PA system. "If you think that's bad, listen to that."

Naomi focused her improved sense of hearing on the driver's area, her animal instincts allowing her to do this despite having never been a panther before, and burst into laughter. "Oh gods, is he singing?!"

"Actually..." Rin said, moving closer, "He's actually not half bad."

"Yeah, not bad." Gary admitted.

Everyone looked at Gary strangely.

"What? I know good music when I hear it." Gary grumbled, folding his arms and turning away.

"I just hope he doesn't go too far." Naomi moaned. "I really don't want to end up with Fox-Cat-baby-things to look after, while they are on their honeymoon!"

"What do you think their kids would look like, anyway?" Rin asked, and watched as Naomi's face slowly contorted itself into an expression of horror and disgust.

"Aarrrgh!" Naomi screamed, clutching her head in her hands. "You just _had_ to go there! Why did you go there?!"

"Could be worse. I could have got you to think about the process, rather than the end result."

"What do you... Aaaaaaaarrrrrrgh!"

The radio had been turned off, and the people in the front seat were now sitting in complete silence. Jack started to think about what just happened, and was had almost happened.

_What the WTF just happened?! She almost kissed me, and I... I think I... wanted it-_

_NO! No. No, absolutely not, no. She's cute, but she's not real. Falling in love with a fictional character is completely pointless; it'd never lead to anything. Except, it almost just did, but that's not the point. She's not real. That almost-kiss... this isn't just me getting a free ride from a rich girl, this is... NO, she is not real!_

A memory flashed inside his mind, using a different voice, saying _"What is real? How do you define real? If you're talking about what you can feel, what you can smell, what you can taste and see, then real is simply electrical signals interpreted by your brain."_

_Yeah, that's just great. Thanks._

_Actually, it might be. I'm in this world, we're all animals here, and maybe if it did lead anywhere and my friends find out about it, I could just tell them that my animal instincts took over, and so did hers. Besides, it's not like anyone from back home will ever know what happened here. I always liked catgirls anyway, not that I'd ever tell anyone. I usually prefer the ones that look like humans, but with cat ears and a tail, Nekomimi, or whatever they're called, but then again, who cares?_

_Then again, what if I've gone insane, and a fellow psycho is currently flirting with me, and I'm imagining her as a beautiful, well-dressed catgirl so that I don't see how ugly she is? Or worse, what if she's a worker here?! Will I have my sentence extended, for forcing myself upon a worker? Or will she be fired, for inappropriate relations with the patients? Will the guilt make my psychosis even worse?_

_By the way, it seems this new Fox body can really charm the ladies when I want it to. I understand the whole scent-thingy, but still, I'm good. I always was good with humans whenever I needed to be, but- _

_Wait, "Humans"? I'm human! I am a human, I always have been, and I always will be, even though I am now stuck as a fox. I'm human, unfortunately. I never met anyone who was anywhere __**close**__ to my intellect, except maybe Naomi. She's just as smart as I am, maybe even better. She's just too lazy to do anything with it._

_Ugh, I __**need**__ to get my own body back. Here, I'm some sort of fox-thing. I can run fast, but that's it. Back home, I'm a handsome, successful, intelligent, A Plus student, who has never lost a game in his life. Here, I'm so helpless and so worthless that I need to seduce a cat and make her think I'm a hobo, just so that I can get some clothes, and a free ride!_

Meanwhile, right next to him, honey was having a completely different moral dilemma.

_I almost kissed him! I've only just met him! _She screeched inside her mind.

_What difference does it make? _Her mind responded._ It's not like anyone would ever want me. He only wants me for my money! Just like everyone else! So why shouldn't I have a little fun with those leeches?_

_Wait, what if he's homeless? I heard something about an alien invasion, what if they destroyed his home, and the homes of all his friends? They certainly aren't from around here, so maybe they're on the run!_

_But then-_

"Honey?" Jack asked, distracting her from her thoughts.

"Yeah?" she responded absentmindedly.

Jack put his hand on hers, and turned his charm beyond 11. "Honey, I just wanted you to know that this is, by far, the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. You have given me a free ride across the country, you've given clothes to all of my friends, and you really are a great singer. Meeting you was the greatest thing that has ever happened to me, and I really wish I could have seen more of you."

_See more of me?!_ She thought with a smirk.

Jack turned his charm even higher, and internally, he was surprised that part of him actually meant these words, even though it was nothing compared to the part of his that was internally laughing his three-tailed rear end off at how cheesy his lines were, and how she was actually believing them. "Soon, Honey, we will be at Central City, and we will never see each other again. I promise you that every time I see your name on a poster, every time I see your company name on clothes, and every time I hear that song on the radio, and every night before I surrender my mind to the blank, bleak, empty nothingness of sleep, I will think of you, and wish you were with me."

"I will be there with you!" She blurted out, before she could think of anything better.

"How?" He asked, closing his eyes and turning away, sending his sadness up to 11. "My friends and I, our homes were destroyed in the alien invasion. When we get to Central City, we will be living in the streets. We shall have to wrap ourselves in blankets, and use cardboard signs to beg for money. Mine will say 'Home destroyed and family killed by aliens. Need money for weaponry to avenge my loved ones'."

"Your family?"

"Yes, my family was brutally murdered. I saw it happen right in front of me. Naomi saw her family get murdered, too. We are together, because we knew each other for years, and we are the closest thing to family that we still have left. We ran, and found the others, who had all met the same fate. All of us have no place to turn to, no place to call home, no family to love, nothing. We all have nothing left."

He hugged her suddenly, silently crying onto her shoulder. The tears would be hard to get out of the fabric, but by this point, Honey was too emotionally moved to care.

"Please don't cry." She said soothingly. "One of my friends, her dad owns a hotel. She's not too bright, but she means well, and I'm sure that if I asked her, she could give you a few spare rooms."

He pulled away. "No, please, you've done too much for me already. I thank you for your kindness, but I just feel like I'm taking advantage of you."

"No." She answered, pulling his head back so that the two were looking right at each other. "People have tried to take advantage of my money before, and this isn't it. This is l- ...This is something else."

"Really?" He asked sadly. "And what would that be?"

The two stared into each other's eyes, and she answered with complete and total conviction, "Love".

They kissed.


End file.
